Hi there throwaway825901, I'm glad to hear that you are finding Scarleteen a valuable source of accurate information about sex and sexuality. Let me start by saying that reading erotica and engaging with sexual media in general is nothing to be ashamed of, however we understand that there are still ...

Hi there Elksama909, and welcome to Scarleteen! It sounds like you're having a frustrating time with finding pleasure via masturbation at the moment; this is actually something that many people experience when first exploring masturbation and sex, and/or at other points at their lives too. Whilst th...

Hi there SillyMcGoof_, did you find anything in the Scarleteen Confidential resources for parents useful? There is also a big list there of other parents in terms of resources, and some of those have information about speaking to kids about masturbation, and the benefits of allowing safe sexual expl...

Hi there l.cuttini, firstly let me say thank you for being so open about sharing how you are feeling in this situation. Unfortunately there are a lot of not useful (nor based accurately in information about how bodies work) messages about sex and what "real men" should be able to elicit fr...

Hi Dannie, thanks for your reply. The whole "clean" thing is a term that has been used for a verrrrry long time because of the stigma around STIs and is still widespread, which has the outcomes around people not seeking testing and treatment that I mentioned in my article. By learning abou...

Hi there Dannie, thanks for coming to us with these questions, it does sound like this doctor shared some misinformation with your boyfriend, or explained himself so unclearly as to cause confusion and misinterpretation. Either scenario is concerning, and of course caused undue stress and concern to...

Hi there with truly-bluely, with medical questions of this type and specificity (and diagnoses, including looking at other factors) it is something that it is best to speak to a doctor about this as there is a significant amount of medical expertise required to interpret all the information, particu...

Hi there SillyMcGoof_, to add on to Sofi's great suggestions, it might also help you to think about the things that particularly engage your brain (perhaps its something with a narrative, or music, or doing something with your hands), if you can identify those, then those can be the most useful in r...

Hi Anon20M, thanks for clarifying that: if I'm interpreting what you've said correctly, it sounds like you can feel the motions of masturbation on your penis, but don't derive more pleasurable feelings from that. You mention being able to experience an erection, however do you do so (ie. get aroused...

Glad to hear the reply was helpful for you . If you have any questions about sexuality or relationships in the future please don't hesitate to post here on the Scarleteen boards.

Hi there SillyMcGoof_, starting off by echoing that as long as you are still able to do the things you need to do (eg. you need to go out to do something, so you still go, even if you are a bit distracted) and you feel like you are in control of when you choose to follow the desire to masturbate (eg...

Hi there MariaSjohn, as Sam mentioned above, it is most likely starting off feeling stressed that is the main thing that is impacting your arousal when trying to masturbate. This is because the brain is a really important part of how sexual response and arousal works. If you are feeling really stres...

You're very welcome! If you have any further questions please feel free to add to the thread or start a new conversation

Hi there Whispermae, firstly I'd like to acknowledge your bravery in being vulnerable with us in sharing these traumatic experiences from your past, we are very privileged to be trusted by you in this way. How does it feel for you when you share these experiences and/or type them out? If you feel co...

Hi there SillyMcGoof_, In terms of approaching how to work out how to make your space feel more intimate, way that could be useful to approach this with is trying individual things tied to your sense and working out a few small things that add the kinds of feelings you'd like to add to your space. F...

Hi there SeanHunkius, and welcome to the boards. I'm sorry to hear that you're in a situation where you're feeling down about your body, but glad to hear that you feel that you can speak with us about this, it is Scarleteen is a safe space for people to ask these kinds of questions. It sounds like f...

Glad to hear that the reply helped! I would recommend reading the articles if you are yet to already, they explore further the ideas that one kind of sex isn't better than the other, and that for most humans, we need multiple forms of stimulation to feel pleasure. Also if you're referring to 'finger...

Hi there Mop, would I be correct in inferring that these thoughts recalling the situation and feeling disgust are intrusive and recurring? In your other thread, we also spoke about you intrusive thoughts about disgust and shame, and discussing these with a therapist from an OCD perspective/addressin...

Hi Juliaho90, essentially the way the pill works has to do with the presence of the synthetic hormones that the pills contain in your body, they interact with your body's systems and cause the effects outlined above (prevent ovulation from happening, to thicken cervical mucus so sperm cells are less...

Hi there lanadelneigh, welcome to Scarleteen! I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling disappointed about your first experience of exploring masturbation via fingering. Whilst it might not assist with the inital feeling of disappointment, I can reassure you that many people have this experience at fir...

Hi Juliaho90, there is no risk associated with what you describe as the timing of sex doesn't have any effects on the effectiveness of your hormonal birth control. What does effect it is the dose interval of taking your pills, which as you note was maintained correctly. This is because what the comb...

Hi there Theansweris42, just to add a quick note regarding control of your own finances and not knowing what your parents would do if you said you were moving out, it would be worthwhile to set up your own account, which you could start trying to keep any money you make in, and also if you have acce...

Hi there awhiskandalamp, sorry to hear that you're struggling with things at the moment. I'm hoping that there will some things we explore together in the context of this post which might be able to help you a bit. The first thing I'd like to raise is the concept that you can appreciate how people l...

Hi Theansweris42, sorry to hear that you've run into an administrative block with your school email, which I assume your parents monitor? In terms of writing things down privately first, could writing a draft of what you want to say in your private email drafts help to keep it private, even if you'd...

Hi Mop, I'm sorry to hear that this experience causing you strong feelings of shame at the moment. As the other volunteers and staff were mentioning, it could be good to look at this not from a sexuality perspective, but through an OCD perspective, looking at why you're having intrusive thoughts abo...