Hi Jaspuppy, I think the best way to go about this would be to get to know people, maybe date them, and bring up the topic of BDSM when you discuss your preferences. I know this is easier said than done, especially if you live in an environment that isn't accepting of trans people. Have you ever loo...

Hi there, Lamie_28! As Sam discussed in your last thread, there is really no way for sperm to pass though multiple layers of clothing like this, even through the gap. Also, precum doesn't usually contain sperm, so that reduces the chances further. All in all, there is no risk of pregnancy in this si...

Hi Archer, As I understand it, when people say someone has orgasmed, climaxed, or finished, they are usually getting at a similar idea — the point of the sexual response cycle when pleasure peaks and tension that has built up in the body is released. Sometimes orgasms can be quite strong, other time...

Hi Foreverl0st, Oof, that must be pretty annoying! There are a couple different things that can cause recurrent yeast infections like this. Yeasts tend to thrive in humid environments, so wearing wet or sweaty clothes for long periods of time might make infections more likely. Using scented products...

Hi there! You don’t need to apologize. It *is* clear that this has been bothering you, and it’s understandable why - questions about gender can be difficult on their own, and in your case they are tied up with some thorny subjects - body image, race, family, and politics - along with painful (and of...

Hi Jay27, I'm sorry that happened! You would be justified in making a complaint against this doctor, but I understand why you would prefer not to. If you're looking for more support, I can think of a few options. You could seek a different kind of therapy — for example, somatic therapy or group ther...

Hi there, Bowler It's hard to pinpoint an explanation for why this might be happening, but it does make sense to me because I've heard similar things before. Especially in asexual spaces, people will sometimes describe feeling both sex favourable and sex repulsed, or moving between the two states. T...

Hi Tempet, You know, not all of these symptoms are associated with pregnancy, and there are many other conditions that can cause these kinds of symptoms. Since you're concerned, you could talk to this person about some of the things that you've noticed. She would know her body best, so she might alr...

Hi there, Xena! You don't have to apologize for responding late — we're always here. I wouldn't say this makes what happened abusive — the key is that you didn't force your sister to do anything. There is social expectation that activities like masturbation should happen in private, but you were you...

Hi Whitelies! Yes, it really is safe, even if you didn't change your clothes that day. I'm glad you're less afraid now than you were before. We do have some great resources on pregnancy scares and evaluating pregnancy risk — would you like to read them? Learning more about this subject might help yo...

Hi SparkleQueen26, Hmmm, it's hard to provide universal advice on how to maximize pleasure with sex since everyone is different. The activities you mentioned are considered foreplay because of cisheteronormative ideas, not because they are inherently less pleasurable than genital intercourse. I thin...

Hi Veronica37111, welcome to the boards! I’ve merged your posts to address them together. I can’t say for sure why you didn’t feel pleasure, but you’ve listed a few plausible reasons. The fact that this was your first time and that you didn’t do much foreplay could have contributed to you being tens...

Hi PomPom, Everyone is different, so it would be hard to pinpoint a single explanation — maybe it is difficult for you to feel aroused at the end of a long day, or perhaps something in your environment needs to be changed. You could try again when you’re at home during the day, to see if changing th...

Hello PathLessTaken, welcome to the boards! So, it sounds like you want to experience pleasure from penetration and orgasm without a vibrator — is that right? We can absolutely explore ways to address these concerns, but I wouldn’t necessarily think of them as problems to be fixed. Often, it is bett...

Hi Sky, Don’t worry, Heather and Sam are very nice people — they may provide advice on your profile, but I can’t imagine them saying that you have no chance. That would be mean, and it is also untrue. It is okay to want reassurance, but do you see how this is an example of negative self talk? You ma...

Hi there, Candikelp! Of course, it is okay to respond after a month. You don’t have a deadline, and we are always here. :) I think that trying a new haircut, a binder, and maybe exploring HRT are great steps to consider! You could also explore masculine voice training and the kinds of aesthetics tha...

Hi Sky! I understand that you had no intention to be transphobic. It isn't disrespectful to be in lesbian/sapphic spaces when you are curious about penises. Since there are sapphic women who have a penis, you may well be able to explore that interest with them. We should only remember that just beca...

Hi there, Sky When we ask you to focus on yourself, it isn't because you should feel fine being alone. Human beings are social creatures — your desire for connection and support and deeply understandable. Taking the time to care for yourself can help you manage anxiety, and tune out any insecurities...

Hi there, Malla_Fluff I'm sorry you're experiencing so much distress, but I'm glad you feel safe talking about a subject that is so personal here. You are not disgusting, you are worthy of love, there is nothing wrong with you, and this will not keep you from finding a loving relationship. I promise...

Hi Sandrah, welcome to the boards!

Yes, you are right! There is no chance of pregnancy in the situation that you've described. Sperm cells are pretty delicate, so they can't survive being transferred to your hands and then being exposed to soap and water.

Hi Sterling, welcome to the boards! I understand this looks like a situation where you have no good options, and that must be really frustrating! You've been on this birth control for a few months, so it is a good time to evaluate whether it is working for you. Before you make changes, you might wan...

Hi The17O, welcome to the boards! I'm sorry, it is clear that this has been very distressing for you! For what it is worth, this does not seem like sexual assault to me. You were not showing deliberate disregard for your partner's safety or wellbeing, you just got caught up in the moment and didn't ...

Hi there, Sky! I think your explanation is clear, and you can certainly frame it this way when you talk to your therapist. I'm just not sure about this idea- if your first time was very pleasurable, why does it mean that you won't feel that good again? As Sam discussed, there is evidence that people...

Hi Dayriri, So, you do experience arousal, but both clitoral and vaginal stimulation feel neutral or painful. In that case, I wonder if it would help to take a step back from genital pleasure to focus on general bodily pleasure instead. Sometimes developing a better connection to your body can make ...

Hi Sky, As I understand, you want to explore a sexual/romantic relationship with someone you trust. Of course it makes sense that you want that. I wouldn't say that you can't have what you want, just that you may not be in the right circumstances. I do feel sex is gross like there’s so much exposed ...