Final update. We broke up :(. It was my first relationship so a lot of my firsts were with this person. We realized that this was going to be a temporary relationship any way because of outside circumstances. So it's better to call it off earlier than later. But I am very sad because I really liked ...

Thank you for your response. I think it's just my insecurity. Sometimes I just feel different from my peers and that makes me feel sad. There are certain traditionally feminine qualities I want to have because they seem "cool" and I don't know how to. And regarding bra wearing -- I have to...

Hello, I am a cis woman and a lot of the times I unironically feel like I'm not like the other girls. It seems like every other girl got a handbook on how to be a girl and I didn't. I understand that gender is a social construct and there is no "right way" to be a girl/any gender(s) you id...

I just talked to him now. He basically reiterated some of the problems we found in our relationship (spending too much time together etc.) and he also brought up things that he does I don't like and also some things I do he doesn't like. Then he said, "don't worry I'll continue to keep an eye&q...

Hello Heather, Thank you for your advice. I tried to talk to him, but unfortunately it sounded like I was accusing him of being a toxic partner without providing any evidence (even though that was not my intention). I did clear up that I'm just anxious about our relationship but didn't go about it i...

It's just that ever since I've read up on these things, I've been hyper-vigilant about finding red-flags in relationships. For ex, the biggest one for me is love bombing. In the first few weeks we would spend a lot of time together and gave each other a lot of compliments. But then we realized that ...

It's just that ever since I've read up on these things, I've been hyper-vigilant about finding red-flags in relationships. For ex, the biggest one for me is love bombing. In the first few weeks we would spend a lot of time together and gave each other a lot of compliments. But then we realized that ...

I think my biggest worry is this. We’ve been close friends before dating and as friends we would spend a lot of time together with our friend group. Once we started dating, we continued that. I think we both realized that it was too much time. Adding to this, I feel like I’ve gotten “too close” to h...

Final question I have is what is disrespect in a relationship? Is two people teasing each other disrespect? We tease each other and there are times where I don't like it. But I point it out and he doesn't repeat it. But is teasing each other a problem? We also "call out" "bad opinions...

I’m not sure actually. I’ve always been the kind of person that second guesses themselves and can’t really make decisions. I also think that sometimes I’m afraid that if there’s something bad then it’s the worst thing in the world so I convince myself that everything is very good. I have trouble rea...

I (20 F) have a boyfriend (21 M). This is my first relationship and his too. I recently heard about red flags and how people miss them so I reflected on my relationship. Unfortunately, I have anxiety and overthink a lot about everything. I'm also guilty of black and white thinking where everything i...

Thank you so much for your replies. All of this has been very helpful and reassuring. One thing I've noticed is that telling my friends has been very helpful. It helped me formulate my thoughts and properly understand what I was feeling. It also helped me that I was among other people/friends and wa...

That does make sense thank you. Final question. You mentioned that one person saying I love you after 1-2 dates is red-flaggy. I think that's the case in most relationships because you really don't know each other. But I think in our case it's not too bad because we did know each other before and we...

I have been an anxious person but never been diagnosed or anything. I think I need help learning what too fast is and is that by definition extremely toxic. Imo I don’t think it is by definition very bad. I think it can be if it’s one person pulling all the strings and being controlling. But if it’s...

Hello, I'm recently in a relationship with someone I've known for 9 months. We got together 2 months ago. We've been friends before that. Recently I came across red flags in relationships and how people miss them. Then I got very afraid that my relationship is toxic and I'm missing all the signs. I ...