Scarleteen

Laayiv

Is it just looking at something and that making you horny, or does it require wanting to do something to/with it?

Laayiv

It makes sense, it's just not how I live.

Laayiv

Hi Laayiv, You've touched upon this tendency of yours to fixate on things that feel wrong to you before. Do you think this might be related to the mental health difficulties that you've mentioned? I've noticed that you can be very self-deprecating, like you think very little of yourself. I understa...

Laayiv

Sure! One might be to try to engage in the media containing that character a bit less, including by exploring new media that interests you or returning to familiar media that you know you enjoy, just to spread your focus around a bit (too, in my experience that can help bring us into contact with o...

Laayiv

Sam W wrote: ↑Thu Feb 22, 2024 9:14 am
As for what to do about this more broadly, I think a first step is to start figuring out how you can disentangle your own identity from that of the character you see as an ideal version of yourself.

Laayiv

Any advice on how to do that, or anything else?

Laayiv

As you may guess, the characters are the one I'm grossly in love with and the one I see as the ideal version of myself (obviously I ship them). The fanfic is seemingly really good (I can't stand to read it), and the author has been quite a nice person, but the specific relation between the two chara...

Laayiv

Sorry, I wasn't trying to reply using that quote, it's just a line I know that I associate with my situation on the whole. I think I've been given all the help I can get, I think I'll be fine

Laayiv

"Through this and through no other fault we fell; nor being fallen suffer any pain than this: Always without hope, in desire to dwell." Dante, The Inferno, Canto 4

Laayiv

Latha wrote: ↑Sun Jan 21, 2024 1:41 am Hi Laayiv,

Do you want to talk to us about that? You don't have to like people, but hating speaking to people must make life difficult. Maybe we can think of something that will make it easier.

I don't know, I'll probably grow out of it. That's the best I can do.

Laayiv

I do want to say that it's a pretty big leap at 16 to go from "I have yet to meet someone who wants to be in a relationship with me and who I want to be in a relationship with" to "therefore I should just accept that I will never find romantic love." It'd be a pretty big leap at...

Laayiv

I've been feeling despondent all of the time for a good few days now, after one substantial crying breakdown about how I would never find love, and I think I'm still upset about the same thing. I've accepted these facts to myself, but yet I still feel sad and lonely, and desire a happy long-term rom...

Laayiv

I don't know, it's just what I feel like I want. Thanks for the other advice anyway, I'll try to work on it. I'm feeling quite good about a couple of things now so this is probably a good time.

Laayiv

I suppose the problem comes from that I don't know how to internalize things like this which I know are true but oppose my emotions and previous assumptions. And that I have a hard time imagining people being as different from me as I feel like this change in ideal relationship would make us. That i...

Laayiv

Hello, it's me again, Upon various moments of introspection, I have realized that I am unable to separate a sexual dom/sub dynamic from the way a couple would interact with people in real life outside of sex, both in my personal desires (and, to a lesser degree, expectations) for myself, and in my i...

Laayiv

Sorry for that I'm not used to this specific form of html talking

Laayiv

Heather wrote: ↑Wed Nov 29, 2023 9:17 am Thanks, that's something I need

Laayiv

I genuinely don't think I can love or desire a real person the way I love Hornet. She feels different to me Oh, how is she different? Is it that you know her in a way that might be difficult to achieve with real people? Does a relationship with her seem safer? Is it because she fits in with your fa...

Laayiv

This is off topic. All I mean is that I would need to try much harder than I actually do in order to really learn the academic disciplines, instead of just knowing facts about things. I can't learn a language or anything. And for the real important thing, I genuinely don't think I can love or desire...

Laayiv

None of the things you listed are bad and very little of it is even abnormal.

Laayiv

If you don't mind, would you talk a bit more about how your love for this character is causing your mental health difficulties? It varies from time to time. I think your seconds guess, that I feel loss or similar due to knowing that my desires are truly unfulfillable, is the most accurate way of th...

Laayiv

She only started coming along after my therapist already decided to discount my actual problem, so that's not the reason we didn't make any progress. I do not think asking to have private sessions again would be hard. However, that isn't what I'm asking about, I want to know how I can try to help my...

Laayiv

I am still seeing that therapist, but now my mum comes along as well and is distracting and prevents it from being private. In any case, I would like advice for what to do in the mean time. Thank you!

Laayiv

For over a year, I have been wildly in love with a fictional character (Hornet from the video game Hollow Knight). This obsession has caused me many mental health issues. I have had numerous very intense masochistic sexual fantasies in the past. This has reduced a lot, but the things I masturbate to...

Search found 24 matches

What exactly constitutes attraction

Re: Saddened (disproportionately) by portrayal of my favourite characters in fanfic

Re: Saddened (disproportionately) by portrayal of my favourite characters in fanfic

Re: Saddened (disproportionately) by portrayal of my favourite characters in fanfic

Re: Saddened (disproportionately) by portrayal of my favourite characters in fanfic

Re: Saddened (disproportionately) by portrayal of my favourite characters in fanfic

Saddened (disproportionately) by portrayal of my favourite characters in fanfic

Re: I still feel lonely despite having completely resigned myself to the fact that I will never have a romantic or sexua

Re: I still feel lonely despite having completely resigned myself to the fact that I will never have a romantic or sexua

Re: I still feel lonely despite having completely resigned myself to the fact that I will never have a romantic or sexua

Re: I still feel lonely despite having completely resigned myself to the fact that I will never have a romantic or sexua

I still feel lonely despite having completely resigned myself to the fact that I will never have a romantic or sexual re

Re: Unable to separate sexual dynamic from everyday life dynamic in my head

Re: Unable to separate sexual dynamic from everyday life dynamic in my head

Unable to separate sexual dynamic from everyday life dynamic in my head

Re: Deeply in love with a fictional character, to the point of it causing other mental health issues

Re: Deeply in love with a fictional character, to the point of it causing other mental health issues

Re: Deeply in love with a fictional character, to the point of it causing other mental health issues

Re: Deeply in love with a fictional character, to the point of it causing other mental health issues

Re: I’m a freak

Re: Deeply in love with a fictional character, to the point of it causing other mental health issues

Re: Deeply in love with a fictional character, to the point of it causing other mental health issues

Re: Deeply in love with a fictional character, to the point of it causing other mental health issues

Deeply in love with a fictional character, to the point of it causing other mental health issues

The Fine Print