Sorry for delayed reply, I had a busy day. In one way that could be why I feel more guilty currently. I already have the association that it’s pleasurable for me to give him oral sex and so feel like when I can’t go through with the inverse I’m denying him a pleasure he likes to do. I think that’s t...

Thank you for answering that question. Yeah, experience in always being overly aware in communication helps. I also used to run a society at university to help those with hidden disabilities so have a fair bit of experience communicating at lots of levels. The tricky bit of communication is neurotyp...

To both Sam and Jacob, Sam, thank you for those links. I’d prefer read them before I say anything about them, I just wanted to acknowledge I have seen them and appreciate you sharing them. Jacob I wasn’t sure the boundaries for discussion hence I said I understood if it needed removing to follow for...

Hi Jacob, Thanks for your message and for asking about uk support sources. I’m aware I’ve come a way from where I was. I know you might need to edit this bit out but I’m going to type it here for you to see anyway. Last may I was planning my death in total honestly. I was stuck living with an abusiv...

Unfortunately yes it’s pretty common to be told no we can’t help you. I did actually try some of the uk based location specific services designed for autism and also got told we can’t help by them too. So if you do hear of any it would be great to know they exist. Thanks for asking. Being able to ge...

Well I’m not 100% sure exactly how relevant all theories I’ve studied are but I’ll mention them so you know what I’m aware of. CBT( cognitive behavioural therapy) definitely doesn’t work on me. While it was administered poorly the methodology didn’t particularly click well with me. While I can play ...

Hi Sam W, Thank you for replying. My partner is aware about my past. In fact he’s one of the reasons I learnt not as bad doesn’t mean it’s acceptable. We have been friends for a very long time before we ended up in a relationship. We used to game together a lot and he used to visit me to cheer me up...

I’m afraid this post is probably a long one so I apologise in advance. I also wanted to clarify a couple of things at the start. Firstly I’m in a safe place now and I have a very loving and supportive partner who is very patient with me. It’s in part to be a better partner to them I feel I’d like to...