Search found 26 matches

by pensiveguy
Tue May 17, 2022 8:55 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Hi - sorry if necroposting like this is against the rules, but I was reminded today of the day I first realised I might be queer and got floored by my first same-sex crush, and I feel like I never really satisfyingly closed this chapter or properly expressed my appreciation. 6 years later(!!), and t...
by pensiveguy
Sun Sep 03, 2017 4:45 pm
Forum: Relationships
Topic: Online friends in a seemingly toxic relationship, I don't know what to do
Replies: 2
Views: 2529

Online friends in a seemingly toxic relationship, I don't know what to do

Hi, I have two online friends, K and D. K lives in England, D lives in Italy. They met in a Discord server that I now run for LGBT+ people (although K is male and D is female), and after a while we found out they had decided they were together: it was amazing and everyone was happy for them! A few w...
by pensiveguy
Mon Nov 28, 2016 12:37 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Wow, can't believe it's been over 2 months since I posted here. I thought I'd update a bit, because a lot has happened in those 2 months. So, yeah. You guys were right. I've got a massive crush on ... well, I'd prefer to call him "T" now, if that's okay. And you know what? I'm actually muc...
by pensiveguy
Tue Sep 20, 2016 5:35 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Yeah, a little. Not as much as I was yesterday evening, but still a little. It was one hell of a thing.
by pensiveguy
Mon Sep 19, 2016 11:34 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

No, never. This would be the first time. I've felt strong feelings for a girl a few years back, but I think I was too young to experience them properly.
by pensiveguy
Mon Sep 19, 2016 1:48 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Clueless. Probably all of the above but I honestly, truly have no idea.
by pensiveguy
Mon Sep 19, 2016 12:46 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Hi all, I wasn't going to mention this at first because I thought I could deal with it myself, but something happened today which really knocked me massively and changed my mind. There's a guy in my boarding house who I've known for a year and a half now, let's call him John for sake of argument, an...
by pensiveguy
Sun Sep 18, 2016 8:33 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Just having a relaxing Sunday afternoon really, not much happening in my head or anywhere else :D
by pensiveguy
Sun Sep 18, 2016 6:12 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Thanks! I always thought I was a good thinker, and I don't really let my emotions take full hold of me normally: which is why it was pretty intimidating and scary when they did. The longer I've been in this thread, the more I've understood that: no one can ever build a complete picture of themselves...
by pensiveguy
Sun Sep 18, 2016 2:25 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

I guess I didn't really realise you could be in between bi and straight, even when bi is by itself in between the two extremes. That might well fit me, definitely for now. I'm too desperate to find an answer to really sit back and let it come to me, I suppose.

Man, sexuality is confusing. :?
by pensiveguy
Sat Sep 17, 2016 2:28 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Yeah, that makes sense. Thanks for clearing that up. I still get these kinda mood shifts, where for a few hours I think "I must be bi, because X, Y, Z", and then I start arguing with myself: "No, I have to be straight because X, Y, Z". I feel like I'm fighting a one-man war somet...
by pensiveguy
Sat Sep 17, 2016 1:17 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Okay. So you wouldn't call, for example, developing feelings for someone after a while of knowing them a "crush"?
No reason really, I'm just interested because I hear the word thrown around way too much to understand it properly.
by pensiveguy
Sat Sep 17, 2016 12:55 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Thanks for the help, I'm a lot calmer tonight than I was this morning.
I have yet another question I'm curious about: how would you define a "crush"?
by pensiveguy
Fri Sep 16, 2016 10:24 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Hi Mo, It's good to know that I'm not the only one who suffers from overthinkitis! :lol: I have football today, so that might help clear my head a little. I think I'm going to sleep for most of this afternoon since I'm super tired and I caught a cold: probably both connected to all of this, it's tir...
by pensiveguy
Fri Sep 16, 2016 1:54 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

I don't really know... I guess it could be the fact that I'm discovering an entirely new and important thing about myself, which is pretty intimidating the more you think about it. Things like "Why are you questioning yourself? You've never had a crush on any other boy", and then a lot of ...
by pensiveguy
Fri Sep 16, 2016 12:43 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

I feel like I've got a million voices in my head right now, all crashing into each other trying to tell me different things. My mood is shifting all the time and it's starting to get to me... I feel like I'm not really in control of myself at the moment; I don't know. It's such a weird experience. H...
by pensiveguy
Fri Sep 16, 2016 6:48 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Separately, definitely: if I tell both. If I tell one and feel that's enough then I'll leave it at that.

Be back in 45 mins or so.
by pensiveguy
Fri Sep 16, 2016 6:33 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Well, not really. With this sort of thing it's more of a "when the opportunity arises" kind of thing, if you see what I mean? I can't really think of any particular time or place which would be the most comfortable.

The questions thing is a really good idea. I'll do that.
by pensiveguy
Fri Sep 16, 2016 6:19 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

No, it's definitely helping. As I said, I'm a very wordy person :D The main objective is just to let them know that I'm trying to work myself out at the moment and there are a lot of emotions flying around in my head: so if I don't seem "normal" lately or in the near future then that's wha...
by pensiveguy
Fri Sep 16, 2016 5:55 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

There won't be a time when we'll be in the same area for a few months at least, if not after Christmas. So not really soon-ish. I have two people I could talk with in person who I think would understand and be the most supportive to start with. Now there's just the "small" issue of what to...
by pensiveguy
Fri Sep 16, 2016 3:41 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Hi Jacob, Thanks for the response, it really helps. I'm really not certain if the people I'm thinking of are aware of how complex sexuality is, but I would be surprised if they didn't know at least what bi, pan and the rest mean. All of the people I'm thinking of would be generally supportive and ar...
by pensiveguy
Thu Sep 15, 2016 2:58 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

By the way I won't see anything for another 7-8 hours since it's 11 pm over here and I'm super tired :D
by pensiveguy
Thu Sep 15, 2016 2:42 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Yeah, I can definitely think of a few and could narrow it down to one or two who I know I can trust and are there to be told. I have a lifetime friend who I would tell first for sure but he lives 150 miles away and I'd much rather let it out in person than over Skype or Messenger.
by pensiveguy
Thu Sep 15, 2016 1:40 pm
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Hi Heather, Thank you for the support and feedback, again I really appreciate it. I don't really have anyone specific in mind yet, I only used the "he" pronoun because anyone I did tell would be male since I'm at an all boys' school and pretty much all of my friends are male because of the...
by pensiveguy
Thu Sep 15, 2016 8:43 am
Forum: Sexual Identity
Topic: Really confused about myself
Replies: 46
Views: 26573

Re: Really confused about myself

Thank you so much for the reply! I have actually read those two articles before and they were very helpful, but I felt like I needed more of an individual response since I haven't had one yet: so I really appreciate the response. I never really thought of sexuality as shifting, I always kind of thou...