Hi!!! My name is Ace and I'm 14 years old

I've been reading topics from this website for a while, however, this is my fist time writting anything lol.
In the past years, i've struggled with self harm, and though I've quit the more.. "conventional" methodes of sh for a year now (YAY!!), i still find myself accidentally scratching myself a lot/pulling my hair when I'm anxious or overstimulated. (Which is most of the time, now that I'm back in school :,,) ). I'm only writting this because I think (i know) I'm a masochist, however, I m scared that if I ever try to explore that, it'll turn into a way of punishing my self instead of seeking pleasure. I guess I just don't know what to do, lol, so any advise'll be aprecciated!!!

PS: I'm sorry this isn't well written, i've just woken up, but i really wanted to write this now cause I've been putting off doing that for a while.