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I need a some advice, pls.
Forum rules
We ask that users looking for general, ongoing emotional support post in this area of the boards, and that you use this space to both ask for, give and receive that support primarily from each other, rather than from our staff and volunteers. As a staff, we simply are often too overextended with all we need to do in running the organization and its services to do that for extended periods of time, and one of our main aims of our community at the boards has always been to facilitate peers to better be there for each other.
Users often report that they have no in-person peers they can talk to or seek support from: we want this to be a space for online peer support and somewhere everyone can get some practice asking for, getting and giving support so that doing it with people in your lives feels more doable.
Please remember that neither staff, volunteers nor your fellow users can provide or replace mental healthcare when that is something you need. Users struggling with issues like anxiety, depression, abuse or physical health issues are strongly encouraged to seek out qualified, in-person help with those issues in addition to peer or staff support.
We ask that users looking for general, ongoing emotional support post in this area of the boards, and that you use this space to both ask for, give and receive that support primarily from each other, rather than from our staff and volunteers. As a staff, we simply are often too overextended with all we need to do in running the organization and its services to do that for extended periods of time, and one of our main aims of our community at the boards has always been to facilitate peers to better be there for each other.
Users often report that they have no in-person peers they can talk to or seek support from: we want this to be a space for online peer support and somewhere everyone can get some practice asking for, getting and giving support so that doing it with people in your lives feels more doable.
Please remember that neither staff, volunteers nor your fellow users can provide or replace mental healthcare when that is something you need. Users struggling with issues like anxiety, depression, abuse or physical health issues are strongly encouraged to seek out qualified, in-person help with those issues in addition to peer or staff support.
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- not a newbie
- Posts: 5
- Joined: Fri Oct 04, 2024 3:34 pm
- Age: 15
- Awesomeness Quotient: I am a sophomore in College
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: She/Her
- Sexual identity: Straight
- Location: Alabama
I need a some advice, pls.
Hello, I have recently been diagnosed with body dysmorphia and bulimia. Somehow it got out at my school and my gymnastics place and I don't know how to handle this. People pass me in the hallway and some of the girls make gagging sounds or call me a fat cow or if I gained more weight. They will also talk out loud about my purging, they will also make comments about my weight and mock me openly. Pls help, I need help on ideas on how to cope with this.
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- scarleteen staff/volunteer
- Posts: 653
- Joined: Sat May 22, 2021 6:13 am
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: Queer
- Location: India
Re: I need a some advice, pls.
Hi there, Chy
I'm sorry you're going through this - it is unacceptable for people to be making these sorts of comments about you. We can discuss ways to you to cope with this, but this situation really requires intervention from an adult, because you shouldn't have to handle this by yourself. Are there any trusted adults at home or at school that you could talk to?
I'm sorry you're going through this - it is unacceptable for people to be making these sorts of comments about you. We can discuss ways to you to cope with this, but this situation really requires intervention from an adult, because you shouldn't have to handle this by yourself. Are there any trusted adults at home or at school that you could talk to?
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- scarleteen staff/volunteer
- Posts: 1154
- Joined: Tue Jul 29, 2014 3:33 am
- Age: 35
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: They
- Location: Leeds UK
Re: I need a some advice, pls.
I just want to reiterate how horrible this is of them to do to you, chy!
Nobody deserves that. I spent a good few years at school getting bullied and it's so gross.
Alongside seeking that immediate support which Latha encouraged, I'll add that some of what helped me was keeping a vague countdown of when I'd finally be able to graduate and be done with those people. I also became pretty focused on the things I cared about (e.g. I got involved in more art & music out-of-school activities) all of which helped those people (slowly) feel less and less relevant to my life. I also think whether it's doing art, sport or smashing plates into a dumpster, expressing the pent up energy from delayed reactions to bullying however you deem fit (and which is safe), can be a real relief. Continuing to try and make friends, based on common interests counts for a lot too. Often you'll find you're not the only one who has gone through, or is going through something like this and even though that can make it difficult to trust each-other at first, finding people who value you the way you're fighting to value yourself can be a godsend.
With whatever strategies you find for yourself, there is a common thread I see of reminding yourself, however you can, that your world is so much bigger, your experiences, interests are so much more varied and rich, than the shortsighted miserable behavior of those who are overplaying their importance in your life by being so cruel.
Nobody deserves that. I spent a good few years at school getting bullied and it's so gross.
Alongside seeking that immediate support which Latha encouraged, I'll add that some of what helped me was keeping a vague countdown of when I'd finally be able to graduate and be done with those people. I also became pretty focused on the things I cared about (e.g. I got involved in more art & music out-of-school activities) all of which helped those people (slowly) feel less and less relevant to my life. I also think whether it's doing art, sport or smashing plates into a dumpster, expressing the pent up energy from delayed reactions to bullying however you deem fit (and which is safe), can be a real relief. Continuing to try and make friends, based on common interests counts for a lot too. Often you'll find you're not the only one who has gone through, or is going through something like this and even though that can make it difficult to trust each-other at first, finding people who value you the way you're fighting to value yourself can be a godsend.
With whatever strategies you find for yourself, there is a common thread I see of reminding yourself, however you can, that your world is so much bigger, your experiences, interests are so much more varied and rich, than the shortsighted miserable behavior of those who are overplaying their importance in your life by being so cruel.
"In between two tall mountains there's a place they call lonesome.
Don't see why they call it lonesome.
I'm never lonesome when I go there." Connie Converse - Talkin' Like You
Don't see why they call it lonesome.
I'm never lonesome when I go there." Connie Converse - Talkin' Like You
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