First Experiences with the OB-GYN

[Sam W]

Something we see some users being nervous about going in for an exam with a gynecologist. So, for those of you who've been, were you worried before your first visit? What were you worried about? If you weren't worried, what helped you be that way? Is there anything that, in retrospect, you'd wish you'd known? Any tips for people who have not yet had their visit?

For example, I was not super nervous before my first visit, because my mom had gotten me a book on periods that discussed OB-GYN visits and what to expect. So I felt pretty prepared. I still wasn't thrilled at the idea of a speculum, but I found that deep breathing and staying as relaxed as I could helped.

[Peonies]

I was very nervous to go for the first time. I think I was most worried that it would hurt. I calmed myself down by remembering that it's just a part of life and most of us with a uterus/ovaries have to do it. The actual exam didn't last that long and my doctor mostly asked me questions and talked to me. She was really nice and took the time to get to know me a little bit beforehand. My advice would be to think about the millions of people who go every year to the OB-GYN and there is nothing to be embarrassed about. If you have questions you'd like to ask your doctor, write them down beforehand so you can have them ready. That's the one thing I wish I had done because once I got there, I forgot everything!

[Infinitea]

I was super nervous the first time I went in for reproductive health care and I think in my case a lot of that came not just from the subject of the visit but from the fact it was the first time I'd had to go through the process of looking for clinic, making an appointment, etc. on my own. In other words it wasn't just my first experience with a sexual health provider but my first time taking care of my own health care, without my parents, period.

What I found the most helpful was talking to close friends who had already gone through the process. One particularly awesome friend even recommended a clinic and wrote out step by step instructions for what would happen when I got there. Little things like knowing that I needed to take a number when I entered and not to forget my carecard helped me as much as knowing what a speculum was and how a Pap smear was likely to feel.

As far as tips go a totally agree with CraftyKid about writing down questions beforehand. I'd add that if you're feeling nervous, reach out to your support group, especially those who have already done it. And if, like I was, you're unsure of the logistics of doing this whole doctor thing on your own, don't be afraid to call the clinic/doctor's office ahead of time.

[SilentDragon]

I had my first gynecologist visit relatively recently. As far as I can tell, the visit was fairly routine, but I was still a nervous wreck pretty much the entire time. There are some things I wish I had done differently and spoken out about. But as I was nervous, I couldn't get the words out or even know what to say. So, here are the things I plan to do next time in order to make this a more positive experience:

1) If there's something I'm too nervous to say aloud, I'll write a note beforehand and/or bring a notepad and pencil with me.

2) Have an "out." If I'm having an anxiety overload during the exam, I will establish a hand signal with my doctor and nurse(s) that will let them know to stop and back off.

3) Request to see what they're doing during the exam. I know some offices already do this, but in the office I went to, I was covered by the paper gown in such a way that I couldn't see what was going on.

4) Have them let me know what they're about to do during the exam. I'm the sort of person who prefers to be warned ahead of time about things. So, not being told made me nervous.

5) Bring someone with me. If possible, I would like to bring a family member, friend, or partner with me to the doctor's because I think being alone as well as being naked in front of strangers was a big contribution to the amount of nervousness I experienced.

6) Call ahead and request that they turn the heat up or air conditioning down. It was seriously freezing in their office, and being uncomfortably cold on top of being emotionally uncomfortable did not help.

7) Have the "I want my tubes tied" discussion after the exam. Now, this might be different for others, because I am only considering getting this procedure done if the method of birth control I would prefer doesn't work out. It's just that getting told I couldn't get the procedure done until I was forty left me with antagonistic feelings towards my doctor, which added to my uncomfortable feelings during the exam. Though, if I were to actively seek the procedure, I'd call around and find someone willing to do it before seeing anyone.

[LanaWinters]

An appointment with your OB/GYN is a great thing to do if you have a lot of question about your sexual health.

I'm 21 years old, and have never had vaginal intercourse. But I'm still sexually active with my boyfriend (Manual, dry, oral)

*PLEASE know that when doctors ask if you are sexually active, it doesn't only mean vaginal intercourse, it also includes manual, anal, and oral! (I asked)*

My parents are Catholics, so they believe in the whole "no sex until marriage."

So automatically when I told my mom that I wanted an appointment with an ob/gyn, she completely freaked! And refused to let me go because she automatically thinks I'm having sex.

The main reason why I wanted a Pap test was because I wanted to get on birth control and talk about my options. Keep in mind that you don't need a Pap test for birth control, but I just wanted to make sure that my lady parts were okay

I decided to go on ahead and make my appointment, without my mom knowing. I am an adult, I'm 21, and it's my body. It's time to take responsibility for my health and choices.

I show up to my appointment and the nurse calls me in. I was EXTREMELY nervous, especially with a doctor looking at my lady parts. Before my appointment, I just made sure that I took a nice clean shower and everything was well down there. You don't need to shave, and I don't recommend shaving the day before since it can cause irritation. As for me, I didn't and I wasn't ashamed of it, these doctors look at lady parts EVERYDAY! Why would mine stand out? I'm just another appointment.

The nurse takes your pressure and temperature and takes you to the exam room and at this point I was nervous because I knew she was going to ask me questions about my sexual life.
I was worried for no reason! They ask about your sexual history (sexually active, any known std, have you ever been pregnant), are you on medication, birth control, and why you're here.

They then walk out and tell you to strip down naked and put on a gown so the doctor can better examine you. They also examine your breasts.
The doctor walks in and greets you. My doctor was so awesome! I was comfortable to tell her everything. She asked me a lot more questions to get to know me better. Sexual activity, any knows std's, any abnormal symptoms that I'm concerned about, questions about any sexual activity I'm engaging in, and if I'm interested in birth control. I asked about birth control and she gave me a brief summary about each method, and she also gave me her opinion on which one would be best for me.

Are you worried that the pap exam will be painful? ITS NOT! She inserted the speculum and opened it up to get a look at my cervix. It was not painful at all. All you feel is the little pressure that the speculum gives you when she's trying to collect samples of the cervix. I was done in less than a minute.

When it's all over, you get to ask any questions you want. I had many questions to ask and I'm glad that I did. From my sexual activity and if here was any risk of pregnancy.

Let me tell you, the same information she told me is the information that is posted on this website. (Pregnancy risks and sti risks)

I had a great experience, if the pain is what you fear, then you're in fear for no reason, it is not painful and I'm relieved to have all of my questions answered

[ratperson]

My first visit, I was very nervous. I had already had the STI/pregnancy/safe sex/birth control talk ahead of time, so we proceeded directly to the exam. I was nervous, naturally, and my doctor was rather impatient about it. I rode horses for over a decade, so my inner-thigh muscles are supremely strong and I couldn't separate my legs as far as the doctor wanted, so she kept trying to shove them apart, which hurt and made me tense up more, etc. (I even told her that I couldn't stretch any more and she said 'sure you can, you aren't relaxed enough'! Hello, I think I know my body better than you do!) The speculum also hurt, but that was mostly because anxiety made me dry 'down there' and so it scraped a bit going in. She even had to get a smaller-than-normal speculum, and it still hurt. The pap smear hurt the most, because when she scraped my cervix with the swab, it felt like she was digging upwards into my uterus. (According to this doctor, the cervix has no nerve endings and I was feeling my uterus moving around from the pressure on my cervix......yeah right. -___-) However, the swab doesn't hurt everyone - it hurt me because I'd been having other pelvic pain (endometriosis-related, my new doctor and I have decided), and my cervix is especially sensitive - any contact with it guarantees mild cramps for the next several hours or days in my case. Not everyone is that way, so it won't necessarily hurt every single person.

After a second, less successful exam (where she was even more hurried and less sympathetic to the fact that I now associated said exams with pain), among other disagreements, I switched to my current doctor, and so far I haven't had an exam with her yet. However, I think she'll be much more sympathetic than this doctor was!