No pleasure

[Alii_Baker]

Hi so let me start explaining my problem I'm 17 and have been with my boyfriend for a year now and everytime we have sex I pretend to be really into it but to be honest I don't feel anything at all from penetration I only orgasm when I'm alone and I touch my clit what can I do to get sexual pleasure it's hard for me to orgasm in fact I don't ever think I've had one.

[Sam W]

Hi Alii,

The best place to start is by talking to your boyfriend before and, more importantly, during sex. That means telling him when what he's doing feels good and when it feels "meh" or when it feels bad. As of right now, if you're acting like you're into what's happening, there's no way for him to know that you're not enjoying it. We have a guide to talking about sex with a partner here: Be a Blabbermouth! The Whats, Whys and Hows of Talking About Sex With a Partner

The next step is to figure out what sensations do feel good to your body or help you orgasm. Many people find that they can't orgasm from penetration alone and do need some clitoral stimulation, and it sounds like you're finding that may be the case for you. If you know what feels good from masturbating, you can then show your boyfriend how to do those things to you.

Finally, it might help to make sure you're not only focusing your sexual time and energy on penetration. That helps you open up more ways to experience pleasure. Does that make sense?