Feeling pressured and depressed

[Secretgirl]

I've been through so much stress lately. My parents have been divorced for 4 years now at least and this year will be the first year I will be with my mom on Christmas. It doesn't feel right. I love my dads house. It is much more decorated and has a nice big tree. My mom has no tree. All she talks about is how we aren't going to get many presents and how we need to stop being so "selfish and spoiled" she always talks trash about my dad behind his back when she certainly isn't flawless herself. She's been in a horrible mood all the time and just puts me down. I don't know what's going on but I've cried myself to sleep over the Christmas things. I feel like this Christmas won't feel right because I won't get to read the traditional Christiana's bedtime story, bake the cookies, open the early present. This all feels so wrong and I'm very upset over it. I really don't know what going on but I hate my larents being divorced. It has ruined my life. My mom also complains about like everything I do. I love my dad. A lot. Idk what this is I just need help

[Sam W]

Hi Secretgirl,

I'm sorry that your mom's house is such a stressful place to spend time. Divorced parents and the holidays are a rough combination at the best of times, and it sounds like your mom is making it more unpleasant than it needs to be.

Can I ask how come you have to spend this year with her? Is it part of the schedule of the divorce arrangement, or something else?

[Secretgirl]

Because I was with my dad last year.

[Mo]

Do you think your dad would be willing to do some of these things you really enjoy with you a little bit after Christmas, so you have a chance to enjoy them when you are back at his house? Maybe you can bake some New Year's cookies together, or keep the tree up for a while longer?