Waiting for sex in a relationship

[Jk2911]

Sorry for posting the Same content, because last time my wording was a bit off and it sounde weird. So ill post again.

Lets say, i have started to date a girl. Should i wait to consider for sex for a few months we have dated, for it to more special or more comfortable and relaxed and i know the person more, so it would be more smoother? I have somewhat researched waiting for sex for a few months, might be healthy for a relationship. What are you thoughts? What if the girl insists doing it sooner? Should we talk about our ideas of our sex, even before doing it? And what we want from it?

Im asking because my last relationship, i might have rushed with sex and thus we didnt know each other so well ,so the sex part was rushed and comfortableness around each during sex or talking about our desires with each other wasnt that good, for the tension during sex could be low. But also back then i was inexperienced, that was also a factor.

Anyway what are your thoughts?

[Karyn]

There aren't really any hard and fast rules with this kind of thing: it depends so much on the people involved. For some people, having sex on the first date is what they want and are comfortable with, other people prefer to wait weeks or months or even years. It can change from relationship to relationship, too; you might find that with one partner you feel better waiting a while, whereas with another relationship you're both comfortable having sex soon after starting to date.

Regardless, communication is always going to be a good idea and an essential part of a healthy relationship, and talking about sex before you have it is a great idea. If you need some help with getting those conversations going, this piece might be useful: Be a Blabbermouth! The Whats, Whys and Hows of Talking About Sex With a Partner

[Heather]

These articles might also come in handy:
• Whoa, There! How to Slow Down When You're Moving Too Fast
• Intimacy: The Whys, Hows, How-Nots, and So-Nots
• When Sex "Just Happened" (And How to Make It Happen Instead)