Hi Guys!
My name is Genie (she and her pronouns). I have been such a fan of your site for so long! This site is the reason I am super into sex-positivity now. So, thank you.
This is the first time I am asking a question.
Here is a little bit about me first.
20 years old
Cis female
Predominantly Heterosexual
VIrgin (whatever that means)
Never Been in a romantic relationship
With that out of the way, here's my question:
I just started college as a freshman and have been looking at birth control methods. When looking at different websites (mainly Planned Parenthood) I came across sterilization (having only heard about it before in the context of the racist forced sterilization controversy). I was reading about it, and have now been thinking pretty seriously about it.
There are a few reasons for this.
1) I am pretty sure I do not want children in the future
2) If I do want children, I am even surer that I want to either adopt or foster, never be pregnant.
3) I have a genetic condition (Noonan's Syndrome) that has a 50% chance of being passed to any offspring I naturally conceive.
4) I also have had heart issues in the past (that have been largely taken care of and resolved) that may make it difficult for me to carry and naturally deliver a child
5) No Hassle- I no this is not a reason to undergo surgery, but it it much easier than taking a pill every day (which I know I will never remember to do).
I know there are many, many other forms of birth control, many that I do not have to remember to take, but I find that this one fits my needs the most.
My question, finally, is: Is it too early to think about being sterilized? I would plan on doing it after college (at around 24 years old). I know its my body and my choice, but do you think it would be wise to wait? Is there anything that I am missing or haven't thought about when making this decision?
I know that this is a bunch of questions, and that this is a very long and rambl-y message, so thank you for your time.
Genie
Too Early for Sterilization?
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sexpositivity94
- not a newbie
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- Awesomeness Quotient: My Open-mindedness. Try Me. :D
- Primary language: English (American)
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- Sexual identity: Predominantly Hetero/Cis Girl
- Location: New York
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Sam W
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 10320
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- Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
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- Location: Coast
Re: Too Early for Sterilization?
Hi Sexpositivity,
So, you've already hit upon the first thing I was going to say, which is that this is ultimately your choice and your body, so you get to do what you feel best suits your needs. I don't think you're too young to be considering sterilization. You know your body and what you feel it's capable of handling, and you sound like you've got a pretty clear sense of how you'd like to go about having children should you decide they're something you want. And it sounds like you've already built yourself a waiting period before you'd have the sterilization performed, which will give you plenty of time to mull it over or do more research if you're worried that there's something you're missing.
The one thing to know as a heads up is that you might meet some resistance from healthcare providers about undergoing the procedure at a (relatively) young age. There's a cultural resistance to young women choosing to be sterilized, much of it boiling down to notions about how all cis women deep down will one day want to carry (or raise) a child in spite of what they say right now. That's not to dissuade you from your choice, just something to be aware that you might encounter.
So, you've already hit upon the first thing I was going to say, which is that this is ultimately your choice and your body, so you get to do what you feel best suits your needs. I don't think you're too young to be considering sterilization. You know your body and what you feel it's capable of handling, and you sound like you've got a pretty clear sense of how you'd like to go about having children should you decide they're something you want. And it sounds like you've already built yourself a waiting period before you'd have the sterilization performed, which will give you plenty of time to mull it over or do more research if you're worried that there's something you're missing.
The one thing to know as a heads up is that you might meet some resistance from healthcare providers about undergoing the procedure at a (relatively) young age. There's a cultural resistance to young women choosing to be sterilized, much of it boiling down to notions about how all cis women deep down will one day want to carry (or raise) a child in spite of what they say right now. That's not to dissuade you from your choice, just something to be aware that you might encounter.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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sexpositivity94
- not a newbie
- Posts: 27
- Joined: Sun Oct 12, 2014 9:28 pm
- Age: 30
- Awesomeness Quotient: My Open-mindedness. Try Me. :D
- Primary language: English (American)
- Pronouns: she/her/hers
- Sexual identity: Predominantly Hetero/Cis Girl
- Location: New York
Re: Too Early for Sterilization?
Thank you so much for such a thoughtful response- and so quick too!
I totally get and agree with everything you are saying. In response to sterilization stigma (doing it so young) I was thinking (if I encounter resistance from my regular GYN) about going to Planned Parenthood. Do you think that I will encounter any resistance there?
P.S I know a common response to a woman saying that they don't want children is "You'll change your mind", but the reason I want to wait a few years is so I can tell whether I will change my mind or not.
I'll do more research on it, but for me, for the long term- barring any 'mind-changing', it sounds like the best option.
Thank you again.
I totally get and agree with everything you are saying. In response to sterilization stigma (doing it so young) I was thinking (if I encounter resistance from my regular GYN) about going to Planned Parenthood. Do you think that I will encounter any resistance there?
P.S I know a common response to a woman saying that they don't want children is "You'll change your mind", but the reason I want to wait a few years is so I can tell whether I will change my mind or not.
I'll do more research on it, but for me, for the long term- barring any 'mind-changing', it sounds like the best option.
Thank you again.
-
Sam W
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 10320
- Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
- Age: 33
- Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: queer
- Location: Coast
Re: Too Early for Sterilization?
You're quite welcome 
I think Planned Parenthood is a great resource for this. I can't promise that you still won't run up against some resistance, but places like PP are going to be far, far more likely to make a concerted effort to insure that their staff respects the reproductive choices and desires of their patients than some other places.
I think Planned Parenthood is a great resource for this. I can't promise that you still won't run up against some resistance, but places like PP are going to be far, far more likely to make a concerted effort to insure that their staff respects the reproductive choices and desires of their patients than some other places.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.