Hi, Lqambar:
I think the feedback and information other volunteers have provided you with is really helpful and spot-on, so I don't have too terribly much to add. But I did want to address your concerns about self-guilt and also your anxiety and confusion about the circumcision option.
I think it's good to remember that if you are doing your due dilligence to keep your foreskin area clean and are using reasoable hygenic practices, then you are doing your part for cleanliness and it will be up to your partner to decide if that's good enough or not. If you are regularly cleaning there and following the guidance provided above, then I do not see why what you are doing would not be good enough for someone. If its a deal-breaker or a serious issue for your partner, and they are not willing to negotiate or try to understand the situation, then you may want to question if your partner is right for you. You mention that your relationship has been great otherwise, so I am betting you are putting too much pressure on yourself right now and your partner may not react in the worst ways you imagine.
I totally get that considering a circumcision is a big, tough, and even confusing decision to make. And that talking about it with your parents may be challenging. Just know that you do not have to rush into this and it may be wise to wait on it until you know for sure (since you said sometimes you like having the foreskin). If you do want to discuss it with your parents but not want to be 100% open about the specifics of why you would like it done, you can just keep the conversation high-level to the reasons you do feel comfortable sharing - like about the hygenic concerns, any discomfort you have, etc.