I'm so confused

Questions and discussion about your sexuality and how it's a part of who you are as a person.
viole3tsrose
newbie
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Sep 05, 2026 1:15 am
Age: 15
My Awesomeness Quotient: im a great artist
My primary language: english
My pronouns: she/her/they
My sexual identity and orientation: sapphic/queer
Location: australia

I'm so confused

Unread post by viole3tsrose »

So im well aware I like girls but im not sure if I like guys. The first time I kissed a girl I was not so long ago, I've had many girl crushes since then. But with guys it's awkward, when I think about me kissing or marrying a guy I get this gross feeling at the back of my throat. When I read fan fiction or books about a straight relationship I'm fine sometimes but it still makes me feel disgusted. Though, whenever I do get crushes on guys I've noticed it's feminine men, men with long hair or who aren't so masculine. I also really can't figure out my label, like am I bi with a preference, maybe a lesbian or just queer?

any advice would be great thanks <3
char
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 324
Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2025 3:08 am
Age: 26
My Awesomeness Quotient: i have chromesthesia!
My primary language: english
My pronouns: they/them/theirs or xe/xem/xyrs
My sexual identity and orientation: aromantic queer/bisexual
Location: southeast asia (SEA)

Re: I'm so confused

Unread post by char »

Hi viole3tsrose! Thanks for waiting--our staff and volunteers aren't available 24/7, and it seems like another volunteer in their shift missed your post in the queue.

This may not be the answer you're looking for, but we really can't say for sure what your sexual orientation is. While there is consensus on what each of the sexual orientation word/label means, not everyone will be on the same boat. It could be helpful to read through the experiences of people describing their sexual orientation as bisexual, lesbian, and queer, and see which one is the closest and feels the most right to you. You could start with these articles on our site:
- The Answers (for Now)
- Q is for Questioning
- Straight, Gay and Everything in Between: On Sexual Fluidity

This article has a list of questions that you can use to reflect on your current understanding of your own sexuality. Remember that you don't need to have all the answers right now! Take as much time as you need to figure yourself out. It's also okay if you've changed your mind in the future: that's the beauty of self-discovery ^_^ The Rainbow Connection: Orientation for Everyone
The shining stars when the night falls / and the sun that leaves behind the sunset glow / They all have their unique colors! (=^・ェ・^=)
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