Scarleteen

Hi all,
So here’s to clarify the first thing, I am of the age of consent in my state, my partner is not. We have both been kinda finding ourselves interested in sorta kinky ways of acting. We both switch from dominant to submissive or we just act like our normal selves (which we do the majority of the time). The stuff we do when we are “kinky” isn’t that intense and can be semi-sexual, only implications through text (no sexting and no actual sexual acts in person) because we are both taking the fact that they are not of age seriously. I’m just wondering whether the fact that we do kinky things is okay considering our ages (we are only a year apart in age). Is it bad that we are acting in these ways are doing this stuff?

Hi Lastdayonearth,

There isn't anything inherently bad about exploring your sexuality at this age, and having an interest in things people might consider kinky is part of that. So there's nothing bad about the fact that you two are interested in this and looking for ways to explore it. It sounds like you're being careful to not push things too far too fast, and are being mindful of where you each fall in terms of the age of consent, both of which are really sound steps to take. Do you feel like you're both comfortable talking about kink and actively communicating where your boundaries are?

We've both discussed boundaries and are very aware of the potential pitfalls of not paying attention to those boundaries. We both want to keep each other safe so we have agreed to back off on the sexual implications we used to have in our conversations and more focus on the "wholesome" aspects of our kinks and stuff like that. We have a "safeword" just in cases we need out of a situation even if it's just over text.

It sounds like you two are doing an awesome job of communicating and setting boundaries! It's great that you're paying so much attention to what feels okay and what doesn't, and what's needed to keep each other safe.