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Not Sex Related but Need Advice Desperately

Posted: Thu Nov 05, 2020 12:04 am
by TownHall
Hello Scarleteen, wow I feel weird making a post that isn’t about sex or reproductive health. I wonder if you guys could still possibly help. I had struggled with some stomach issues for the past 2 years, this year I finally got some exams done and one exam showed that my gallbladder was low functioning. My doctor said he recommended surgery for me because it only continues to lose function and there isn’t treatment for it except getting it removed. I had a consultation with the surgery team and told them my history and they also said they recommended it, I waited a month before I had it and during that month I had some serious pains to the point where I almost went to the hospital. So now I’m like 10 days post op, been eating only soup and rice but I’ve been on the internet looking up all the horrible side affects of surgery and It’s safe to say I am scared. I’ve had two panic attacks about it now, thinking I failed myself and maybe I should’ve done more before I just took it out and I’ve been reading posts about how natural remedies help and that doctors are liars and that the gallbladder affects hormones and thyroid and all other things. Things that the doctor never mentioned and how people have diarrhea all the time or gained insane weight and though my doctor did tell me about the diarrhea he didn’t say anything else. I’ve read stories of people who struggle after it and regret it. I feel really anxious and like I made a mistake and I didn’t get enough information before hand but I did ask questions like what after life looked like, what I could do, why it happens, everything I thought I needed and now i am feeling guilty and sad and like I made a mistake. I don’t know what to do, it’s upsetting me beyond anything I ever knew.

Re: Not Sex Related but Need Advice Desperately

Posted: Thu Nov 05, 2020 8:47 am
by Sam W
Hi TownHall,

I'm sorry that this is causing you so much stress and that you're worried you made a mistake in getting the surgery. If it helps, from what you're describing it sounds like you did do your due diligence before making your decision; you asked the consultation team for their opinion, and you asked about what to expect after the surgery and about potential side effects. And while doctors are only human, and sometimes make mistakes or have biases, there's no reason to assume yours lied to you about the recommended treatment. So, if there do turn out to complications down the line, it won't be because you rushed into things.

Something else that may help is to focus less on the potential side effects and more on how your body is actually doing during the recovery. You can't address things that have not, and may never, happen to you, but if you notice side effects of parts of the recovery process that worry you (like a sudden increase in pain, fever, things like that), then you can contact your healthcare provider and talk about how to manage them. Too, the kindest thing you can do for yourself right now is to take a break from reading about side effects or alternatives to the surgery, since it's sending you into serious panic. How about taking at least two days to not read any of that and to focus on other things?

Re: Not Sex Related but Need Advice Desperately

Posted: Fri Nov 06, 2020 6:13 am
by Heather
Just FYI, I have a bunch of personal experience with life post-gallbladder (mine ruptured and gave me sepsis, removal wasn’t optional) and the GI upsets it can result in. Happy to share my own ways of managing them if you like.