Scarleteen

so i've had this...friend...for over a year, we've always flirted and in the summer we made out a few times but now we're "just friends" again, who knows what'll happen in the future, i'm not pressed abt it but there's the backstory. you know it's a good relationship when it takes a paragraph to explain but anyway, here's the thing: he once told me he went through a "gay phase" and "did something with his friend", and once when we were watching tv together he sort of out of the blue said something very sexual about a male character. i'm bi myself, so obviously it's cool if he is, but i can't help wondering. if he is i think it's a shame that he doesn't realize, and it's something that would be cool to have in common.

Hi confusedinlove,

It seems your friend might be bisexual based off what you said, but remember how we choose to identify is up to us. If he identifies as straight, whether it be for now or forever, then he is straight for all intended purposes. However, the reason I said he might be bi is because he did have same-gender sexual activities and that's something he will consider if he decides to come out. In the meantime, just make sure he knows it's safe and comfortable to be himself around you (as I'm sure you already do, so just continue doing so!) and give him time to figure it out on his own. I know you want what's best for him but this is a situation that just has to play itself out.