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Never Been Able to Orgasm, HELP!!!

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
forbiddensnacc
newbie
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue Oct 11, 2022 1:53 am
Age: 22
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Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/they
Sexual identity: Bisexual
Location: United States

Never Been Able to Orgasm, HELP!!!

Unread post by forbiddensnacc »

I'm probably too old to be here but I'm 20, AFAB, and have never been able to orgasm. I've been with 13 people intimately, including my current partner (19, AMAB) of 7 months. Every one of them has said they'll be the one to get me to orgasm and every one of them have failed. I can't even get myself to orgasm, masturbation doesn't give me pleasure unless I'm REALLY horny, typically right before my period starts. I've tried multiple sex toys and lubes, both vaginal and clitoral stimulation. Nothing works. I'm starting to lose hope, it feels like my body is broken. I just want to experience sex like everyone else does, how amazing people say orgasms are is giving me the worst FOMO. It also inadvertently makes my partners feel bad about their performance, especially those who have made other women orgasm before. I feel like I've tried every position under the sun, and a few times I think I felt close, but the feeling always goes away. The most I've ever accomplished is squirting, a few times in solo play and a few times with my boyfriend. It's only been achieved through clitoral stimulation, and doesn't feel any different than the rest of the sex experience, so I don't think a orgasm came with it. How can I fix this problem? Am I doing something wrong? Or is my body just broken?
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
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Age: 33
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Location: Coast

Re: Never Been Able to Orgasm, HELP!!!

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi forbiddensnacc,

We serve young adults as well as teens, so you're all good there!

I want to start out by saying your body isn't "broken;" orgasm struggles are still pretty common, though that doesn't make it less frustrating when your body isn't behaving how you want it to.

To start out with, can you tell me a little about what your experience with pleasure is during sex or masturbation? For example, do you start feeling a lot of it and then it feels like it gets "stuck" at a certain level? Does it keep going up only to suddenly disappear? Are you not feeling much of it, period, with partners?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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