Scarleteen

I've been masturbating and fantasizing about sex for a large portion of my life even though my religion forbids it. I've never really thought about it, and it didn't make me feel dirty (and still doesn't) when i masturbate just because it's "forbidden". with that being said, my body has been changing these past few months (i posted about it here, looking for advice) and I've come to the conclusion that even though my body is fine, my clit just takes longer to recuperate after an orgasm, i feel like i want to detach myself from sexuality and especially masturbation?? like maybe i shouldn't do it... as much?? maybe every few months.

i think there's an aspect of sex-positive medis that kind of convinces you that you HAVE to masturbate, and now im feeling conflicted because i know that masturbating and fantasizing at the rate im doing it as of now (or before?? im definitely doing it way less now but still not as little as i want to) can kind of distract me from my academic goals and life goals in general... but i can't help feeling kind of bad about it even though i know this decision is what's best for me personally. help?

Hi kdksksk,

If dialing back on how often you masturbate feels like the right choice for you, then that's totally a choice you get to make! At the end of the day, sex positivity is about encouraging people to make choices based on their specific needs or desires, rather than insisting there's a one-size-fits-all approach to sexuality.

Too, having times where you masturbate a lot and times where you masturbate infrequently (or not at all) is kind of the norm for a lot people as we move through our lives, so there's nothing inherently negative or "off" about not doing it.