Scarleteen

for context i am turning 16 by the end of this year and I think I might be ambiamorous or moniflexible. the thing is, I have not been in any romantic relationships at all but I know that I want to do something with more than one person at once. Like, I'm pretty sure that I want to have at least one sexual experience with more than one person at the same time and I'm not opposed to a polyam relationship. In fact, I think being in a polyam relationship would sound pretty nice. I just don't know if all of this is in my head and when I do eventually get myself out there and in the dating pool, these feelings would go away. I also kind of feel like these feelings are just a result of me being "selfish", i guess, since I'm over here wanting more than one partner at a time and it's not genuine polyam feelings. On top of all that, I am super inexperienced in dating so i dont even know what I truly want in a relationship. And of course, my age. Help?

Hey!
I want to first say that age and experience don’t change your ability to identify with what feels best to you. It seems like you have some sense of what you want, but being uncertain is okay too! If once you start dating a bit more you decide a polyam relationship isn’t for you, that’s perfectly fine. Sexual identity is fluid and can change over time, but that doesn’t make how you feel any less real.
I also want to add that you don’t have to label yourself if you don’t feel ready yet. Being unsure, stuck in the middle, or pretty sure is valid. Your feelings aren't selfish, and whatever feels most comfortable to you is what matters. Hope this helped!

Hi sugarcrash,

I want to second everything Coral said, and also add that, since it sounds like you're still working out what you want from relationships, you might find this article super helpful: Supermodel: Creating & Nurturing Your Own Best Relationship Models. If you haven't already seen it, A First Polyamory Guide might help you with some of those questions about how to interpret and navigate your interest in poly relationships. When you read that polyamory series, are there certain things that stand out to you? Does it feel like it's describing your experiences?