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new relationship embarrassment

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theatreluvin
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new relationship embarrassment

Unread post by theatreluvin »

hello everyone!! :D I have entered a new relationship and i'm very happy about it. we're deciding to take things slowly sexually and I really like that he respects me and my boundaries. I don't want to go further than making out right now. the only problem is something pretty embarrassing happens when we start making out. my vagina gets really wet, which i know is normal, but the problem is that he can feel it through my pants sometimes. i tried to put a pad on before we kissed yesterday, and it leaked out of the pad and down my legs. he didn't say anything bad about it, he just pretended to ignore it so that i didn't get embarrassed or anything. he brought it up later on and said he didn't mind at all, but I still don't want it to happen because it's physically uncomfortable for me.

is there any other way to combat this or will I just have to deal?
Sofi
scarleteen staff/volunteer
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Re: new relationship embarrassment

Unread post by Sofi »

Hi theatreluvin! I'm so glad to hear you're happy in your new relationship!!
While vaginal secretions are normal, I understand for some people it can feel embarassing, especially around someone you like. Rest assured it's nothing to be ashamed of! It sounds like your partner is pretty understanding of it, so that's one concern off the table. As far as how to combat it, unfortunately there isn't really a way to do that. Pads are a good idea, have you tried only liners or also the kind with wings? That should prevent it from running down your legs, since they can hold quite a bit of blood as well.

I'm going to link an article about this topic in case you find anything in it useful :)
What's With Being Wet from That?
theatreluvin
not a newbie
Posts: 29
Joined: Fri Jun 05, 2020 10:51 pm
Age: 23
Awesomeness Quotient: I taught myself how to do a backflip
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: fluid!
Location: America

Re: new relationship embarrassment

Unread post by theatreluvin »

i really liked that article!! thank you for sharing it.

i haven't tried the one with wings. i think i'm just experiencing a bit of past trauma from my last relationship where if i wasn't wet enough i'd get blamed for it. so now i'm worried the opposite will happen, even though my new guy is really sweet and wouldn't say anything like that to me, it may just be some psychological thing.
Sofi
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 478
Joined: Fri Sep 04, 2020 12:23 pm
Awesomeness Quotient: I make my own nail art!
Primary language: Spanish or English
Pronouns: she/they
Sexual identity: Queer
Location: USA

Re: new relationship embarrassment

Unread post by Sofi »

Oh, I am so sorry that you went through that. I can understand completely and trust me, not every guy is like that! Your new boyfriend sounds like he's very understanding and also mature. It might be good to have an open and honest conversation where you tell him all of this (as much as you're comfortable sharing, of course). If you feel ready for that, it could really help by hearing verbal validation that he really has no issues with it, and also he will know more about you and it'll bring you closer. Again, only if you're ready to be that open and vulnerable, which can have great benefits but must be done on YOUR own time.
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