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Talking

Any questions or discussions that you ONLY want to discuss with our staff or volunteers.
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flugame
not a newbie
Posts: 16
Joined: Sat Feb 12, 2022 4:28 am
Age: 18
Primary language: English
Pronouns: he/him
Sexual identity: Homosexual, aceflux
Location: England

Talking

Unread post by flugame »

Hi
There's a guy I've liked for a few months and I'm intending on asking for his sexuality and then asking him out if he's gay. Unfortunately, I'm an awful procrastinator and I'm not gonna see him again after April so basically it's now or never and I find it really difficult to just ask him. I really struggle just bringing up awkward conversation topics in general, especially recently, and this is pretty important to me and I want to do it but I never know how to bring it up/how to not freak out about it etc etc, and I just can't bring myself to ask even though I know it'd probably save me a lot of stress. I'm scared I won't be able to ask in time (in which case I could text, but I'd rather do it face to face) so I'm trying to make sure I do it as soon as possible, but I saw him yesterday and just could not ask. So in short, help. I've never initiated these kinds of conversations in past developing relationships and while ik it's really not that big a deal, I'm having trouble convincing myself that.
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Talking

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi arrivederci,

Asking someone a personal question, especially someone we like, can definitely be nerve-wracking, so I get why this feels awkward! Generally speaking, when you're trying to have a tricky conversation, the more you can approach it in a way that's to the point and honest, the better. Too, it might help to write out what you want to say ahead of time and practice it; that can help you feel less like you're scrambling to come up with what you want to say in the moment, which can make it a little easier to be confident in the conversation.

Too, are there anything things of his you can look at, like social media accounts, that might clue you in to his sexual orientation?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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