Safe pornography

[alb266]

My 13 year old is thankfully having open a s honest conversations with us. He is starting to be interested in girls (although we’re fully supportive of any and all sexual preferences) but knows the concerns regarding most pornography. Is there a “safer” way to explore sexual images/media at his age? Thanks.

[Sam W]

Hi alb266,

It's awesome that you've created an environment where he's comfortable having these kinds of conversations with you! And it's really good that you're also trying to have honest conversations about sexual media with him.

When it comes to safely exploring sexual media at his age, I actually think books are the best option. YA fiction can and does include stories that deal with sex and relationships, including sex scenes. Those scenes are written with the age of the reader in mind, which makes them both a more accessible option and a safer one, because then he's not trying to wade through content made more adults. If your library has someone who specializes as a teen librarian, they'd be a good person to ask for recommendations, and we can also offer a few if you're interested.

[alb266]

That’s a great idea. I’d be open to suggestions. If he is looking for more in the way of images (he’s aware that friends have watched porn so has a sense of what is out there) do you have any suggestions in that realm? Thanks so much.

[Sam W]

If images are a better fit, then what you might want to look into is graphic novels/comics; there are plenty of those that explore sex and relationships and do so with a visual element, and that still gives you the element of them having reading and content levels that good for teens and young adults. In terms of recommendations, this reddit thread is a good place to start: https://www.reddit.com/r/YAlit/comments ... ex_scenes/

Another thing to consider would be romances or erotic compilations of stories or comics aimed at adults, though you might want to read those ahead of time yourself if you have concerns about content (or there are things he's told you he really wants to avoid in the media he consumes).