Sexual interest

[Jan]

I am a 15 year old boy who is currently experiencing a lot of changes in my sexuality. (In a good way, i really enjoy getting all these new feelings and ideas. It's really fun to discover yourself ). However with it come thoughts that make me feel uneasy: i started feeling a lot more horny, like alot alot. I masturbate way more than before and fantasize alot. I especially really want to experience real and intimate sex! Masturbating doesn't satisfy me at all anymore. It all makes me feel uneasy. I sometimes really wish i wasn't a minor and could feel how it is to have honest sex. What are your thoughts on this and how could i get rid of this insecurity?

Sincerely, jan

[Sofi]

Hi Jan, welcome to the boards!
You know, it's definitely normal at your age to be going through these changes, including the increase in sex drive and the desire to experience that intimacy. May I ask, what do you mean by having 'honest sex'? Also, when you say masturbating makes you feel uneasy, do you mean physically or mentally? Is it an insecurity because you feel some shame around doing it, or just because it doesn't satisfy you anymore?

[Jan]

It's more mentally, it's true that i often feel abit ashamed when i masturbate. I physically enjoy it alot though i know that masturbating is absolutely normal, but i still feel like its wrong in some way. This often ruines it. I think the main thing behind that is the intimate sex (honest is a bit a poor choice of words by me xD). This kinda makes me feel like masturbating is just not right.
Another reason might the porn. Though I just started reading erotic books and it works way better morally for me.

Thank you for responding!

[Sam W]

Hi Jan,

I'm glad you're finding that you're more comfortable consuming books instead of other sexual media! To make sure I'm understanding correctly, is it that you feel like masturbation is something you're only doing to tide yourself over until you can have partnered sex and that's making you feel weird about it? Is it that you're worried that masturbation will make partnered sex less intimate when you have it? Something else?