Scarleteen

Hi, I'm Tina.
I'm 16, I need your help please.

I had sex with my bestie, a guy. He cummed on the bed but yet I was nervous even when I took a morning-after-pill, I read reviews saying it doesn't work so I decided to tell my mum I had sex to see cause I was having pregnacy symptoms to see if she can advice me but she took it as a crime then took my phone.

Was what she did right even when she didn't buy the phone for me? I've begged her to give me back, she said she wouldn't.

Hi Tina156,

I'm so sorry your mom reacted that way to you asking her for support and advice. To answer your main question: no, I don't think punishing someone for having sex is every an okay thing to do. And it's extra not-okay for her to take something that's yours as part of it.

How can we best support you around this? Do you want to talk about how to approach the situation with your mom? Or would it make more sense to focus on how to get another phone so you're not cut off from that form of contact?

Just so you know, the morning after pill is actually very effective, especially if you take it very soon after the incident you're worried about. You can learn even more about it here: Emergency Contraception (Plan B or the Morning-After-Pill).

Sam W, thanks for replying.

I didn't know it was effective, wish I never told her.

Wanted to get a new job but finding a part-time job is hard her, I don't know what to do.

I think looking a new job is a sound call, even if it's hard to come by. It sounds like the more ability you have to make your own purchases and choices, the better. We can use this space to brainstorm some ways to get started on that process, if that would be helpful.

Does your mom do things like this often? Things like taking your stuff (including essential items like phones) or otherwise cutting you off from communicating with people?