Scarleteen

I've always had the idea that if you have a crush on someone it means you *like* them in a romantic way AND you acknowledge their physical attractiveness. But my friend seems to have a different notion. They think that finding someone cute/hot is liking them. I personally think that's not true because there have been plenty of people who I find cute/hot but *like* them. So, what is a crush?

On a side note, I find many people of all genders cute/attractive everyday. I'll be walking and if I notice someone to be good-looking I think, "oh, that person is good looking" just as an acknowledgement. Is this weird?

Hi vidvoop,

Crushes, like a lot of types of attraction, will feel a little different from person to person, and that can result in people defining them a little differently from each other. So, both you and your friend are experiencing them, they just look a little different for each of you. I would say a defining element of crushes is that there's some kind of recurring element. You're either seeing them in on a fairly regular basis (like a classmate) or you're seeing them from far away and can choose to see them more (like seeking out movies with a celebrity who you're crushing on). Does that make sense?

As for those fleeting moments of "oh, that person is good looking," those are really common! We tend to notice things about people we pass by during the day, and that can include noticing that we think they're good looking.