Fetish and losing virginity

[Jeffsoup]

Hello,
I am almost 16, and for the past 4 years I have been masturbating almost exclusively to hypnosis/mind control porn and videos. I haven't shared this with anyone else because I feel like it is an uncommon fetish to have, and am afraid of how they would react. I got into it when I found some erotic hypnosis videos on youtube and was intrigued/aroused by the idea. Ever since then, I have masturbated to pretty much only that, and I have recently grown worried that I won't be able to get aroused when I do eventually have sex with a partner. I have tried masturbating to normal pornography as something of a test, but I can't really get and mantain an erection when I try.

I am not sure what to do, which is why i am making this post here. Am I making too big of a deal out of this?

[Mo]

Hi there Jeffsoup, and welcome to Scarleteen.

One thing to keep in mind is that it's very common for people to have sexual desires and interests that they enjoy exploring through sexual media or masturbation that they either don't want to explore with someone else during partnered sex or don't feel a need to explore with others. It could be that hypnosis play is something you only want to explore in fantasy, or that it's something you enjoy doing with partners sometimes but not always. Only wanting to masturbate to this content doesn't mean you'll need it in order to enjoy sex with someone else.

I think it'll take some time and experimentation with other people to learn what it is that you prefer when you're being intimate with someone else. It might be that you prefer hypnosis with actual partners as well, but just because you like that for fantasy/masturbation purposes, it doesn't automatically mean you'll prefer it so much you won't enjoy any other kind of sex with people.

[Jeffsoup]

Thank you for your response. I guess i've never really looked at it from that point of view before. I sort of just assumed what you enjoy as a fantasy would be the same in real life.

[Michaela]

Hi Jeffsoup,

I'm glad you found Mo's response helpful! I want to pop this resource into the thread as well for you to look through if you want more information
(How to Approach Sexual Fantasy and Desire on Your Own). Feel free to respond if it brings up any other questions or thoughts.