Clarification Question

[George914]

Hi, in the article you're not pregnant why do you think you are, Heather mentions that a risky activity is direct contact between ejaculate and the vulva. I was curious if this also includes scenarios where maybe something like taking a shower would wash down the ejaculate from somewhere else like the breasts or stomach, or maybe where ejaculate would drip down on its own from another body part? Or is it purely meaning if someone cums straight onto a woman's genitals?

[Siân]

It means ejaculating directly onto the genitals.

[George914]

So those other scenarios are not classified as pregnancy risks according to that article?

[Michaela]

For those other scenarios, since there is ejaculate involved there is some pregnancy risk but it would be categorized as lower risk depending on the amount of fluids, how close to the genitals, and how recent.

Sperm can survive for about 15-30 minutes outside of the body (dry surfaces or skin). If the ejaculate is dried it is no longer able to create a pregnancy. So, although it is not impossible, it is unlikely due to the specific conditions that would be needed for the sperm to remain viable and travel through the vaginal opening to the uterus.

[George914]

If there is a risk in those scenarios then was that not taken into account in the "You're not pregnant why do you think are?" article where Heather says that ejaculation on the back, breasts or buttocks are not something that can cause pregnancy? I thought that this would have accounted for ejaculate dripping or being washed down in the shower if those parts of your body were ejaculated on. Just clarifying, this is not an Anxiety inquiry, just trying to make sense of the stuff I've read on here.

[Carly]

Hey Adam224 -- I think what you're hitting on are the differences between high risk, low risk, and no risk situations. What you're describing was taken into account in writing the article; what Heather means is that ejaculation on those places is not an immediate cause for concern because of the way sperm behaves outside of the body and on the skin. Dripping down the body is not equal the sperm travelling or swimming. Also, if someone was actually intending to get pregnant, this could not be achieved by someone ejaculating on those spots. Considering all of this, the risk for pregnancy occurring is very low, as others have said. The reason this remains a risk at all is because there is some kind of contact with sperm. Examples of activities with absolutely no risk would involve barriers (like dry-humping with clothing on) or separation (like mutual masturbation where you only touch your town genitals or just not engaging in sexual activities with others in person). Does that explain it a little better?

[George914]

That does explain it a bit better. The main mechanism I was wondering about is the pregnancy risk of sperm getting rinsed in the shower and flowing from the breasts or stomach to the vagina being washed down with the shower water. I wanted to make sure that this activity is pregnancy safe because my girlfriend prefers to wash off in the shower that way but I wasn't sure if it posed a pregnancy risk. Is this specific scenario low-risk or no risk since I've heard that sperm and water don't cooperate well? Is the semen dripping down on it's own higher risk than if it was rinsed down by the water since it's more concentrated and not diluted?

[Carly]

Hi Adam224 -- up top I want to be very frank with you about what I'm seeing in your posts here and in other threads. I know that you've said that you're asking these questions not out of anxiety but for understanding, however... something I want to point out is that we have explained why pregnancy in this scenario is highly unlikely quite a few times at this point. Mo also explained this in the older thread you found and responded to. As a group of folks what deal with these kinds questions a lot, we've come to recognize the need for multiple explanations by different people as a symptom of anxiety, anxiety about pregnancy in particular. We know that the possibility for an unplanned pregnancy is very stressful, but we have very strict boundaries around this kind of questioning. We're here to help you, but the way your questions are unfolding is starting to brush up against our policy, which you can read here. Because of this, we're setting the limit with you of no more asking if a hyper specific scenario like this can create a pregnancy. You are more than welcome to keep asking us questions and using our services, but we ask that you consult our resources for very specific and situational questions going forward.

Something I want to make clear is that sperm aren't very strong or very advanced for being the thing that sets a pregnancy in motion. As I said, ejaculate dripping anywhere or moving in any way outside of your testicles (and not inside a vagina) does not equate the sperm swimming toward the vagina to get inside. If they were ejaculated on breasts or another part of the body, they simply don't know where to go. And if they were to make contact with water in the shower, that complicates their little existences even further. Who's Afraid of Sperm Cells? explains how volatile sperm really are. Another resource that might help is Human Reproduction: A Seafarer's Guide. I also found this advice column where someone asked a very similar question to what you've been asking about.

Additionally, many people reduce the chance of getting pregnant (and relieve some anxiety) by using contraception. What do you and your girlfriend use? I don't believe we've discussed this yet.

[George914]

Hi yes I only commented on the other thread because Mo said no risk and you were saying there was some risk so I just wanted to clarify why he was so confident there was no risk? We don't have penetrative sex so no contraception is used, and me ejaculating on her body was the riskiest thing we've done. I just wanted to ensure it wasn't posing a risk even if the water transported the sperm down to her vulva, since contact between sperm and the vulva is a risk but I wasn't sure if the mechanism of it being carried by shower water to the vulva was equal to it being ejaculated onto the vulva. This was something I posted about anxious in the past but now it was more geared towards understanding since my anxiety is greatly reduced. But when I read the discrepancy between you saying low risk and Mo saying no risk is what ignited some doubt in my mind again and I wasn't sure who to trust...Mo said it had the same risk as manual sex which is none, but you said low risk and on the other page on this website that lists different acts it says stuff like anal sex is low pregnancy risk but pregnancies have happened that way, so you can see why I would want to inquire further, since one person says pregnancy isn't possible and the other says that it is but just low risk.

[Nicole]

Hi Adam224,

When talking about the possibility of pregnancy, "no risk" or "low risk" is often used interchangeably due to the fact that there is no perfect form of contraception, if that makes any sense. In your case, there is most likely no risk. This is the most direct answer we can give. If you didn't have any form of penetrative sex, then there is no way that the sperm could have entered the vagina. We have given you the proper resources for this scenario so please utilize them!

[George914]

Thank you for your response, I tend to get caught up in semantics which probably does stem from anxiety. I guess that one little word difference was the difference in my head between certainty and not which caused the thought to dwell on my mind again. I do have a question for you as a woman if you're okay with answering it, when women take showers do things go into the vagina such as water and soap when rinsing off? Anyway, thanks so much for your help...sorry for pushing the limit of what's okay or not on here.

[Nicole]

I completely understand your worries! It's actually quite harmful for anything to enter the vagina while showering because the vagina is self-cleaning. Of course, people will wash the vulva, which is the outer area. However, the inside of the vagina should not be washed. I hope this helps!

[George914]

Thank you it really does help! As long as nothing you're rinsing off goes into the vagina then semen wouldn't behave any differently. I couldn't really find anywhere online that would answer such a specific question and I was too embarrassed to ask women I know. You people on this site are amazing, thanks again!

[Mo]

You're welcome!