Scarleteen

Hello,

I've heard that it's illegal for children to consume pornography (just from the zeitgeist and also from adult websites). Is this true? If so, do I have a moral obligation to follow the law in this regard? If I don't, how do I not get caught? What might happen if I am caught?

Hi LightUpTheStage,

So, in the U.S at least, the laws (and their penalties) are much more focused on people who distribute or otherwise allow minors to access pornography, rather than on a minor who seeks it out. For instance, if a twelve year old is caught with a copy of Playboy that they bought, the person liable to get in legal trouble is the shop that sold them that, not the minor. That's also a reason you see "adult" sites online not allowing you through unless you confirm your age; they need the protection of saying "well, we made it clear this is only for adults, we're not deliberately trying to provide porn to minors."

Where it gets sticky is that not all access sexual media is as tightly monitored as the access to visual porn. Libraries, for instance, are generally not going to alert anyone if a fifteen year old checks out fifty shades of grey, because what someone chooses to read and borrow is considered private. A space like Archive of Our Own only asks if you consent to see explicit content if you click on a story with an explicit rating, not your age. So the question for the person accessing those spaces becomes less about the law and more about their own comfort and privacy. Are they okay encountering things that may gross them out or put them off while reading a book or story? Do they have the privacy at home to consume it? What happens if the other people in the house find out about it?

Thank you, trainer of fierce flora! That makes me feel a lot better about.. stuff.

This is maybe a different topic but I'm going to spin this into another one: I've heard (from SEVERAL legal websites) it's illegal for minors to have consensual sex even if they were born within a week of each other or some such arrangement, and that both participants in the act would be technically considered rapists and potentially become registered sex offenders (which seems ridiculous to me, since that would make literal rape LESS illegal than consensual sex between 17-year-olds), but I've also heard of Romeo and Juliet laws that say it's legal for, say, a 16-year-old to have sex with a 19-year-old (or some such), which, based on what I (think I) know, is like saying that murder is legal if you do it in a diner as opposed to a bar. What gives? Could I or my partner be penalized if we were caught having sex? What about in specific situations? I had a friend who had sex at school (privately) and while I am ABSOLUTELY certain that I would never do such a thing, I am (and I must emphasize, this is SOLELY for my own curiosity) curious what the different consequences would be.

Hey LightUpTheStage -- I agree, there are some inconsistencies in U.S. law. I think something that also complicates things is the fact that some states have different laws than others, an example of this being age of consent differing in different states. I don't really have an explanation for why one state would feel differently than the other, other than different people in power with particular beliefs at the time that the laws were passed/amended/etc. According to the resources I found, California's age of consent is 18. This means that the state, as an entity, believes anyone under that age cannot legally consent to sexual activity. California does not have a "Romeo and Juliet" law, which I think means that, yes, a minor could face legal consequences for having sex with another minor. As for those consequences, it might depend on the specific situation. Discussing the intricacies of those specific situations and their consequences would likely be discussed and decided in court or between lawyers.

Thank you! Couple questions here: I've never heard of this actually HAPPENING. Is this a case of "not a rule if you don't enforce it," or are there documented examples of people actually becoming sex offenders for having consensual sex with people their age? And, if so (or even if consequences are more minor - no pun intended), what are those consequences? Might those be reported on or televised publicly? Should I be extra secretive about my sex life (if I ever choose to have one), in case someone with a grudge against me hypothetically calls the police on me?

Hi LightUpTheStage,

There are cases in which young people, or a young person, faced legal consequences for consensual sex. Those consequences varied by case, but enough have put young people on sex offender registries that I found legal papers arguing for changes in the laws. So while it's not a common occurrence, sadly there have been cases where consensual sex lead to legal consequences.

In terms of your own sexual choices, when we talk about considering risks before choosing to do things, this would fall under that category. Risks associated with sex aren't just physical; they can be emotional interpersonal and, yes, in some cases even legal, which is why we encourage users to do an honest risk assessment with themselves as part of deciding whether or not they're ready for sex.