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Gay by circumstance, not by choice

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hypatia_
newbie
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Joined: Mon May 15, 2023 6:32 pm
Age: 23
Pronouns: he/him they/them
Location: Philippines

Gay by circumstance, not by choice

Unread post by hypatia_ »

I've never managed to cum by doing it the conventional way (stroking). All my life I've cummed by laying on the floor on my stomach and grinding against my hand, not directly grinding my penis but the spot just above it. i also have a small penis and have developed breasts even without taking estrogen (maybe from all these years of stimulating my nipples) this has scared me from pursuing romantic and sexual relationships with women, but thankfully (i guess) that im cute enough and that guys want to f*** me, and i let them since its the only way i can get some where my features are accepted.

i know i will never be capable of being romantically involved with a guy and this has led to me ghosting them and its consuming me with guilt.

i need advice on what to do please
Sam W
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Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Gay by circumstance, not by choice

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi hypatia_,

Let's get a few of the misconceptions out of the way first. Developing breast tissue has nothing to do with stimulating your nipples; as you already noted, it's actually to do with hormones and, to a certain extent, things like body type (and I want to point out that there are men, cis and trans, who have noticeable breasts). Secondly, there's nothing wrong with reaching orgasm the way you described. There's no one "right" way or "wrong" way to reach orgasm; there's just the way (or ways) that work for your body.

My next big piece of advice is to stop having sex with men unless it's something you actively enjoy, rather than something you're engaging in because it feels like your only option. Because right now, what you're describing isn't a healthy or fair set-up for you, or for them. You deserve to pursue romantic relationships where you're actually romantically and sexually interested the other person, and these guys deserve to pursue relationships with someone who might be interested in having the kind of relationship they actually want. Does that make sense?

But I think my biggest question here is: why do you think women would not be interested in you? What about pursuing relationships with them scares you?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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