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I can’t ever seem to get wet

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
coolapples4
not a newbie
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Jul 18, 2023 1:34 am
Age: 22
Pronouns: they them
Location: us

I can’t ever seem to get wet

Unread post by coolapples4 »

Either if i’m by myself or with someone else no matter what i do i can’t seem to get wet even when i’m turned on. I tried online remedies or eating differently but nothing seems to work. I don’t have an issue just using lube but it’a not ever around when I need it, and it definitely doesn’t feel good to use nothing. Is vaginal dryness normal? Is it something I should worry about? There’s no other symptoms other than I am completely dry inside and out and always have been.
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: I can’t ever seem to get wet

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi coolapples4,

So, there are some things that can cause vaginal dryness, including specific medications or health conditions, so it's possible that's what going on here. Dryness can also be more or less likely depending on where someone is in their menstrual cycle. Are you noticing you also produce little to no vaginal discharge the rest of the time?

Can you say a little more about what you mean by lube no ever being around when you need it?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
coolapples4
not a newbie
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Jul 18, 2023 1:34 am
Age: 22
Pronouns: they them
Location: us

Re: I can’t ever seem to get wet

Unread post by coolapples4 »

The only medication i take is adderall but i don’t think that’s the issue because i was dry before taking it. And yes i almost never see discharge unless i’m about to start my cycle.
About the lube, i don’t usually have access to lube because it’s inconvenient to carry it around with me whenever there’s a chance i could need it. Whether it’s me alone or with someone i can’t always trust to have it on me and it would be better to get to the bottom of why i can’t naturally get wet.
Latha
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 653
Joined: Sat May 22, 2021 6:13 am
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Queer
Location: India

Re: I can’t ever seem to get wet

Unread post by Latha »

Hi there, coolapples4!

Often, lube is still useful for people who produce natural lubrication. For one, not everyone's vagina will always lubricate enough for certain activities, or lubricate the same way all the time- but also, it can just feel nice to have more lube even if someone technically makes enough natural lubrication. Does that make sense?

When you say lube is inconvenient to carry around, do you mean the big bottles? I think you can get little bottles or packets of lube- maybe those will be easier to carry in a bag or pocket? You could also try to use a vaginal moisturizer every few days- they're available without a prescription.

As Sam mentioned, there are a number of things that could cause vaginal dryness- beyond health conditions and changes in your menstrual cycle, there's also dehydration, stress and fatigue, STIs, and sensitivity to things like laundry detergents. Since it's a good idea to see a gynecologist regularly anyway, I would recommend bringing this up to one- they could tell you whether there is an underlying health issue causing this.
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