Scarleteen

hi!

so especially after i’ve started to become more comfortable with my sexuality, gender, plurality, etc, i’ve realized my bottom dysphoria has gotten a bit worse.

mainly i just have this intense yearning for having a penis and being able to use it for various things like a cis dude would. i just want one so bad and it causes me so much pain to know that i cant exactly have one rn.

i know that T would help ease the dysphoria a bit bc bottom growth and stuff but i probably wont be able to get it for a while bc me and my mon agreed to take care of my medical stuff first (also i wanna talk about it with a therapist first, and i dont have one yet so yeah. if i tried to get T they’d probably make me see one anyways tho)

i also know packers are a thing n stuff, but idk how i would convince my mom to let me get one as i really want the more realistic ones so then it feels like i actually have a penis (they’re kinda pricey too)

so yeah, any advice on what i should do?

Hi SillyMcGoof,

I'm sorry the bottom dysphoria has been bad! You're right that going on T could help with that- even though it will take some time before you can get hormones, do you want any help finding a therapist?

I understand how this could be a difficult topic to bring up with your parents. Since your mother is supportive, I think you could try to make the case to her that getting a packer is important to you because it will help you manage your dysphoria. Packers may be expensive, but this request is related to your health and well-being- that should be a good enough reason to look into it. So, during this conversation, I would try to cover what packers are exactly (to make sure you're both on the same page), and why you need it (to help manage your dysphoria). You could end by asking her if you could make a plan to save money to buy one, as well as any other things you may need, like underwear that can hold the packer in place. In the meantime, you could try to DIY a packer.

hiya!!!

i dont think i need help finding a therapist atm. i did have a therapist for a few weeks but he left the practice so they’re trying to reassign me someone rn (hopefully they’ll find someone soon)

i can definitely try all those things!! i have found packers that are like $27 or so so hopefully that’ll make things a bit better. i’ll try to talk to her about it soon and hopefully it’ll go well. as for finding something to hold it in place, would harnesses for strap ons work? or just those like crotchless underwear for men? i’ve looked into underwear and harnesses specifically for packing and they seem to be kinda pricey, so i was wondering if that could work bc those are much cheaper and i could just put regular boxers over it.

also one more question not related to this whole thing as i dont think it really warrants a whole new thread, especially bc im already here; so like i have a bit of a mustache, although its not super duper noticeable, so i was wondering if i could use some beard dye on it to darken it? i asked my mom about it and she said it would just dye my skin a bunch so idk.

thanks!!

You can actually put a packer in place in just standard underwear, no harness needed! This guide offers some starting advice for how to pack, including how to pack with normal underwear, and the bigger site also as some hacks for helping keep it in place: https://ftm-guide.com/guide-to-packing- ... -transmen/

With the mustache, I agree with your mom that at this point dying it is likely to mark your skin up more than the hair itself.

oo ok thanks!!!

and dang, that sucks, but thats good to know

oh!! also one other thing about the packer is that im worried that my mom will be super averse to the idea of me basically getting a fake penis and stuff. like she’ll be like “hell no you’re too young” or something. i dont wanna get one of the foam packer things bc i want a penis shaped packer to better ease dysphoria, and also at that point at least for me i might aswell just use a sock or something.

also, if i do get a packer, can i like paint it with acrylics or something to make it more realistic looking?? i mainly just wanna paint the tip bc i want it to be more realistic than just the single color most cheap packers have without having to dish like $70+ on one that’s already painted.

If your mom raises concerns about the packer, it might help to present it as being similar to a bra or underwear. Yes, it's technically related to a body part that can be sexual, but it's actual function is more cosmetic and more about helping the person wearing it feel comfortable in their body.

As for painting it yourself, I think as long as you're just painting the end of it and not the part that sits against your body, I think you should be in the clear.

ok thank you!!! those are both very good things to know!! :]