Hard to move on from him

[carrotcake122]

I just need some advice to move on from this guy who I've known for a long time and had a crush on and was even best friends with him. We had good times together and now it's fall and fall was when we had first met eachother and now I miss him even more.

[Sam W]

Hi carrotcake122,

Is this someone who's still in your life to some degree but you can't, or don't want to, pursue your crush on? Or did this friend leave your life entirely sometime in the recent past?

[carrotcake122]

Yeah he's still in my life but I don't want to pursue my crush because I don't think he feels the same way about me

[Sam W]

Got it. There are a few different ways you could approach this, and they depend on what you feel would be the way to help those feelings subside. Do you think time is enough on it's own to let the crush fade? Or are you getting the sense that in order for it to go away, you might need to interact with him a bit less?

[carrotcake122]

I honestly already moved on from him like I don't think about him anymore it's like I'm completely past that

[Sam W]

Ah, okay, thank you for clarifying that. In your initial post, you mention missing him. If he's still in your life and you feel like the crush is in the past, is there something in particular that's getting in the way of connecting with him?

[carrotcake122]

Well I was mad at him for a lil while which is why I haven't reached out

[Nicole]

Hi carrotcake122,

I'm really sorry to hear about what you're going through! I know what it's like to have a particular time of year bring back so many memories. Could you give us some more details about the situation so we can get a better idea of how to help you work through this?

[carrotcake122]

Okay so me and this guy we were best friends, we would always hangout we even went to prom together the thing was it was so confusing with us. So then one day I decided to go tell him I wanted to confess my feelings towards him the confession was that I had liked him since we already had graduated and I wasn't going to see him after because I was moving. The confession never got to him, I remember seeing him text my best friend a emoji and that's why I got so mad. It's like I hate that I'm so quick to overthink a situation you know. He probably thinks I'm mad at him.

[Heather]

Thanks for filling in the details.

So, do you want to be back in contact with him? Do you want to be friends again? I can't get a sense of that from your posts.

[carrotcake122]

Yeah I wanna be back in contact with him

[Sam W]

Got it. What if, as a first step, you sent him a pretty basic message saying that you miss spending time with him and would like to hang out. If you've already moved, that hangout might have to take the form of a call or something like that, but it would still give you two the chance to reconnect and catch up. Does that feel like a reasonable starting place?