struggle masterbating.. [ftm]

[thatguyfr]

ok so, i've never actually posted anything (especially like this) online or in any kind of forums so this is a first.

to start, as the title says, i am FtM.. while i don't like using the word 'trans' i guess i fall under the umbrella.

i also identify as asexual, i think it relates with my gender and not feeling comfortable in my body, but sometimes i just get,, an urge?
..i dont know what i would call it, really.

i'll say i havent had the best sex ed ever so even when it comes to things like this i still am fairly uneducated (or i just forgot.. its been a few years) but i would like to learn and this i feel is something i need to know. and i sort of have another question too..

1. actually.. how do you masterbate, in general. i feel im doing something wrong. and i literally cannot find my clit.. i dont know how long ive tried looking, im not seeing any 'hood' or anything.. usually my version of masterbating is grinding against my hand/knuckle (whilst wearing boxers) and at some point it feels.. nice?? it definitely feels pleasurable but the longest its lasted is around 15 seconds, it makes my legs feel like their burning and numb, but in a good way? i dont really feel a release or satisfaction after it goes it's sort of annoying, but feels nice in the moment

and my 2nd question is how to shave? since i feel uncomfortable in my body in general im prone to not taking very good care of bits that are seen as 'womanly' or whatever, so ive never actually shaved. i dont really feel comfortable mentioning my age but im young enough that i cant go by a shaver myself, or really have access to one in general. i dont know anything about shavers.. like ive seen a few but i have no idea which way you're even supposed to hold it? i would like to get rid of the hair but its just hard i guess..

[Sam W]

Hi thatguyfr,

With masturbation, there isn't really one, specific way that people are supposed to masturbate; it's one of those things where the way(s) people do it depend on the likes and dislikes of their bodies. If you're looking for some common ways people do masturbate, this article is a great starting point: Going Solo: The Basics of Masturbation

As far as shaving goes, are you referring specifically to shaving your pubic hair, or to shaving body hair more generally?

[thatguyfr]

hi, thanks! that definitely calmed some of my nerves, i was wondering, though, if the weird tingling and numbness feelings in my legs is normal. is that something thats common?

i'm referring to shaving body hair as a whole, but specifically on privater areas.

[Sofi]

It's not uncommon for people to experience some tingling on their legs during masturbation, arousal and/or orgasm - unless it gets to be painful tingles, or numbness to the point you can't feel them at all, then it's nothing to be worried about.

As for shaving, it depends on the kind of shaver you get. There are razors, which are commonly used for that area and the most inexpensive and easily accessible option, you want to use some sort of shaving cream or gel (could also find at at-home alternative like coconut oil, aloe gel or shea butter) but make sure you don't use it IN your genitals, only on the outer area. Other than that, you can probably do a quick internet search to see an example of how to hold the razor in your hand and what direction to go in etc. The most important thing is that area is very sensitive so you want to be gentle and not rush it. Does that help?