Scarleteen

so i've been dating this girl for uh...a few weeks, but we've basically u-hauled lol, our dates tend to end up being 20+ hours, i said no hookups and she said nothing serious but we jumped into both sex and emotional intimacy whiplash-fast (it's fine i promise), i'm so into her and i think she feels the same way.
in fact, i'm so serious about her, i'd eventually like to introduce her to my parents - and now i'm realizing i have literally never done that. in my teens i got used to sneaking around - i have no reason to do that now, but my brain instinctively gets freaked out when i even think about telling them i'm dating someone.
i need a script, maybe, for bringing up that i suddenly have a girlfriend they've never heard of. they'll like her, i think, but it's just this weird embarrassment. it doesn't help that i've been spending weekends at her place and saying i'm crashing with a friend (i'm an adult, they literally don't care, i just don't like them explicitly knowing i'm having sex)
so how do people...do this? i don't know how to be in a normal relationship, everything's great when we're alone, or with friends, or in public surrounded by strangers, but the idea of meeting each other's families (well, my family, hers are... let's not get into it :/) like a Real Couple is a bit nervewracking. but i know i want to do it, i realize how early it is but we have such a connection and i can imagine a future with this girl so easily. for now, though, i just need some idea of how to break the ice with my mom about being in a relationship. idk, maybe i could even practice a conversation with someone.

Hi there, Confusedinlove!

I understand why you're feeling this way- it can be pretty embarrassing to think of telling your parents about a relationship for the first time. Still, from what you've said, I get the sense that your parents don't seem like they'll have objections to you dating someone, or dating a girl specifically. Also, it is fairly likely that they've expected you to tell them about having a partner at some point- this news may not be shocking to them.

So, how should you go about speaking to your mother? Try to bring this up when you both have enough time to have a proper conversation and in a situation where both of you are relaxed. There are a couple of things I think you might want to mention in this conversation:

• You have a girlfriend now (obviously).

• You have a really good relationship with her, and you're serious about her.

• It is important to you that your parents meet her.

• You think they'll like her.

Be clear about what you want from your parents. As I understand, you want their support, and you'd like them to make time to meet your partner at some point in the future.

You could start the conversation by telling your mother you want to talk about something important. Or, you could start by asking a more neutral question, like what she would think about you dating in general- this may give you an opening to talk about your partner.

What do you think of this?