i enjoy pain?
i enjoy pain?
hi uh recently ive been enjoying pain fear and sadness. like i dont wanna be happy, i want to be even more depressed. its like i find comfort in it, it makes me feel good?? i think its probably my body & mind trying to cope with all the physical and mental pain ive been getting recently, so it makes me enjoy it? i dont know. i dont wanna stop experiencing pain or depression i actually want it even to be worse. i also dont want to explain why ive been getting pain. idek why im writing this when i dont even want my pain to stop. i just want to tell it someone i guess?
-
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 10320
- Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
- Age: 33
- Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: queer
- Location: Coast
Re: i enjoy pain?
Hi rwxn,
So, from your description, this situation is probably going to be best addressed by a therapist. While I don't believe that pain, or even sadness or fear, are bad things to experience or to enjoy in certain contexts, or that people have to only be happy all the time, the fact that this seems to be a response to bigger things in your life suggests both it, and those things, need to be addressed for your long-term wellbeing.
Do you know how to find mental health resources? If not, that's something we could help you get started on.
So, from your description, this situation is probably going to be best addressed by a therapist. While I don't believe that pain, or even sadness or fear, are bad things to experience or to enjoy in certain contexts, or that people have to only be happy all the time, the fact that this seems to be a response to bigger things in your life suggests both it, and those things, need to be addressed for your long-term wellbeing.
Do you know how to find mental health resources? If not, that's something we could help you get started on.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
-
- scarleteen founder & director
- Posts: 9703
- Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
- Age: 54
- Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: they/them
- Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
- Location: Chicago
Re: i enjoy pain?
I do want to just poke in and ask if what you mean in this post is simply that it feels good to let yourself fully feel and have feelings of pain, sadness or depression. We can often get the message in the world that if and when we are having those feelings, we need to work to get rid of them, to feel differently, rather than just letting ourselves feel them.
But even when feelings we are having are difficult or aren't happy, it can often feel good to let ourselves explore and feel them, and we may even feel like it benefits us to follow them as far as they go. We have to be careful when we do that with dark feelings, for probably obvious reasons, but wanting to feel them, and feeling good about letting ourselves, isn't automatically a problem or a bad thing, like sam mentioned.
But even when feelings we are having are difficult or aren't happy, it can often feel good to let ourselves explore and feel them, and we may even feel like it benefits us to follow them as far as they go. We have to be careful when we do that with dark feelings, for probably obvious reasons, but wanting to feel them, and feeling good about letting ourselves, isn't automatically a problem or a bad thing, like sam mentioned.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
-
- Similar Topics
- Replies
- Views
- Last post
-
-
New post I want to have sex with my boyfriend but I can't enjoy it
by Sam W » Mon May 06, 2024 1:02 pm » in Scarleteen Updates - 0 Replies
- 4288 Views
-
Last post by Sam W
Mon May 06, 2024 1:02 pm
-
-
-
New post I can’t enjoy masturbating. Is this normal?
by Piebymeh » Sun Sep 29, 2024 3:46 pm » in Sex & Sexuality - 9 Replies
- 1365 Views
-
Last post by KierC
Tue Oct 01, 2024 8:31 am
-
-
-
New post I (19 mtf) can’t enjoy masturbation anymore.
by beaspecific » Tue Jul 30, 2024 7:48 pm » in Sex & Sexuality - 7 Replies
- 3538 Views
-
Last post by Sam W
Fri Aug 02, 2024 7:59 am
-
-
-
New post Am I getting too old to enjoy shipping my favorite fictional characters that happen to be minors?
by Malla_Fluff » Sun Nov 03, 2024 8:35 am » in Et Cetera - 3 Replies
- 469 Views
-
Last post by Jacob
Mon Nov 04, 2024 11:53 am
-
-
-
New post is there any way to help breast pain during periods?
by cheesepotato » Fri Oct 11, 2024 9:45 am » in Ask Us! - 3 Replies
- 1001 Views
-
Last post by Jacob
Mon Oct 14, 2024 7:15 am
-