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Masturbation Questions

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
THECONFUSION?!
newbie
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Nov 13, 2023 12:02 am
Age: 24
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Primary language: English
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Sexual identity: A woman
Location: Sacramento

Masturbation Questions

Unread post by THECONFUSION?! »

I just met this guy, were already talking and discussing what kind of stuff we like. We just started sexting and one time, I was masturbating for him through a call, we were facetiming and i felt good at first. I got wet but as minutes go by, I suddenly felt awkward, I just couldn't get turned on anymore. I don't live alone and I was stressed out that I might get caught, this is also the first time I've ever masturbated in front of anyone so everything was new. I just couldn't feel good anymore after a few minutes, I don't know if its because I was nervous that he was watching me? Because right when he left the call, I felt relaxed and actually felt good when he was gone but right when he came back I was so tensed and stiff. Could it be that I'm turned off when someones watching me masturbate? and I was doing this with the lights on, I didn't feel right watching myself masturbating through a camera, I think I prefer the dark.
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Masturbation Questions

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi THECONFUSION?!,

I split this post off into it's own topic since there were some additional things I wanted to address in it!

To start, it may very well be that you don't enjoy being watched while you masturbate. While some people find they like it when a partner does that, others find it makes them self-conscious or otherwise doesn't feel super great (and other people don't feel strongly one way or the other). Did it feel like masturbating for him was something you were excited to do at first, but then as you became aware of the sensation of being watched, or of watching yourself to some degree? Or were you not really into the idea from the start?


Too, being stressed out by the idea you might get caught could also have played a role here. Do you have trouble having the privacy to masturbate more generally? Or do you actually have a decent amount of privacy but something about this made you feel like you were more likely to get caught?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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