Scarleteen

Hi!
My period is currently two weeks late and I am a little nervous because my cycle is typically regular. I have never had sex but me and my bf have done other things. I am worried because of two things:
1. He may have fingered me (penetrated with fingers) with some pre-cum on his fingers.
2. We dry humped and he had a wet spot on his boxers.
I took a pregnancy test two days ago and it came out negative but I am still hella scared since my period has NEVER been this late.
I have been stressed a little but not a lot so maybe that could be it but really I don't get why its so late.
I have some stomach and back pain and a good amount of discharge.
Please help I am so so scared.

Hi medmaniac24,

So, none of the activities you engaged in pose a risk of pregnancy. That risk only comes when there's direct--as in no barriers like clothing--contact between genitals or if there's direct contact--as in immediate with no stops along the way--between ejaculate and the vulva or vagina.

Too, it sounds like you've already done the main thing we recommend when worried about pregnancy, and that you have the negative test as extra proof that you're not pregnant.

As for why your period is late, there are lots of other things that can cause a period to come later than expected. You can read more about that here: M.I.A or, Dude, Where's My Period?

Hi Sam,

Thank you so much for your response.

I took the test two weeks after my period was expected, is there any way it was false negative because I took it too early? I have read that some women dont see a positive until much later. Should I take another test?

Sorry I really do not think I am in the right head space for sexual activity because I get scared like this EVERY month.

Hi there, Medmaniac24

I understand your concern about a possible false positive, but you don't need to take another test because the activities you described posed no risk of pregnancy. That is to say, you can't get pregnant from those activities.

FYI, here is the general rule to follow for when you should take a pregnancy test: you should wait a minimum of fourteen days from the time of the sexual contact that you're concerned could have resulted in pregnancy or until your period is late. So you tested at the right time.

Sorry I really do not think I am in the right head space for sexual activity because I get scared like this EVERY month.

This is a good thing to know about yourself, actually. Since you get scared like this so often, it would be helpful to take a break from having sex to address what is causing those feelings of fear. Would you like to talk about that?

Some resources:
M.I.A or, Dude, Where's My Period?
Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That?
Birth Control Bingo
The Buddy System: Effectiveness Rates for Backing Up Your Birth Control With a Second Method

Let us know if you have any questions!

Hi,

So when should I be concerned if I continue to not get my period? Just want to be in the clear incase I need to get a medical abortion. I really cannot be pregnant and it feels so suffocating knowing I may be too late and stuck with something I don't want.

I am defiantly taking a HUGE step back from sexual activity though!

Hi medmaniac24,

So, you don't need to worry that you might need a medical abortion, or any abortion for that matter, because what you did posed no risk of pregnancy in the first place. Too, you have the negative test as proof you're not pregnant.

The general recommendation is if you miss more than two periods, that's the time to check in with a healthcare provider as there could be some kind of underlying cause that needs addressing.

Hi,

So I took another test cuz I was so scared and it was a blue dye test, it was negative but I checked a few minutes later (after 20 mins) and there was a blue (very thin line) showing positive, I know that these tests can be faulty. I literally do not know what to do anymore I feel helpless and like giving up.

It's so unfair I did not even have intercourse and now it seems like I am pregnant. I read it could be evaporation lines on the test which is common after its time. I cannot talk about this with my parents because they cannot handle the stress right now. My period still is not here.

What should I do?

Hi there.

I think this needs to be the last response we put here when it comes to your scare, because it seems like the way your anxiety is operating, you're just having a hard time accepting and believing the facts.

You got a negative result. What happened after the test sat isn't an indication of anything save why they tell you not to look at it later: evaporation can change how results look.

You got that negative result because you can't become pregnant from the activities you posted about here. Your period hasn't come when you expected it, but there are a bunch of more likely reasons for that: that you don't have regular cycles in the first place, for instance, or that when you're expecting your period isn't actually timing in line with how your cycles are operating. And yes, stressing out can do that, too.

I think what it is time to do to help yourself best is to stop focusing on this in this way. No more tests, no more thinking about it, no more asking about it, because you aren't going to be pregnant from this.

You've made clear that you're constantly afraid of pregnancy, every cycle, so it seems to me that what's going on here isn't a pregnancy but anxiety and fear of pregnancy.

How about we shift the conversation to a place that's more likely to actually address what's happening -- your constant fear of pregnancy, not a real risk of one -- and see where that takes us instead?