It's common enough for young people (and all the more so for LGBTQ young people) to be in sexual relationships where they do not feel they can be -- or just do not want to be -- honest with parents about the whole of their relationship, or some parts of it or sex within it.
Obviously, that can be stressful as hell, for a million reasons, and also can make all your relationships feel really unstable, like there's a ticking bomb under them and you just waiting to go off. We've also seen how often sneaking around seems to make it harder for some of our users to make sexual choices they feel good about, to deal with fears or conflicts around sex or their relationships, and to seek out things they need, like contraception or sexual healthcare.
And of course, if and when parents or guardians do find out, and they usually do, you've often got a double-whammy on your hands, where they have bad reactions to what you were hiding, paired with how they feel about you being dishonest with them, and catching you in lying.
Sound familiar? Want some support, including talking about other options so you don't have to deal with sneaking?
Can you record a brief video of yourself talking about how Scarleteen has helped you? We're looking for clips for a fundraising video in the new year, and we'd love to have you involved! You can find out more, including how and where to upload your video, here: Scarleteen’s Project For Awesome 2025 submission! Our deadline for these is December 23rd 2024!
Sneaking around
Forum rules
We ask that users looking for general, ongoing emotional support post in this area of the boards, and that you use this space to both ask for, give and receive that support primarily from each other, rather than from our staff and volunteers. As a staff, we simply are often too overextended with all we need to do in running the organization and its services to do that for extended periods of time, and one of our main aims of our community at the boards has always been to facilitate peers to better be there for each other.
Users often report that they have no in-person peers they can talk to or seek support from: we want this to be a space for online peer support and somewhere everyone can get some practice asking for, getting and giving support so that doing it with people in your lives feels more doable.
Please remember that neither staff, volunteers nor your fellow users can provide or replace mental healthcare when that is something you need. Users struggling with issues like anxiety, depression, abuse or physical health issues are strongly encouraged to seek out qualified, in-person help with those issues in addition to peer or staff support.
We ask that users looking for general, ongoing emotional support post in this area of the boards, and that you use this space to both ask for, give and receive that support primarily from each other, rather than from our staff and volunteers. As a staff, we simply are often too overextended with all we need to do in running the organization and its services to do that for extended periods of time, and one of our main aims of our community at the boards has always been to facilitate peers to better be there for each other.
Users often report that they have no in-person peers they can talk to or seek support from: we want this to be a space for online peer support and somewhere everyone can get some practice asking for, getting and giving support so that doing it with people in your lives feels more doable.
Please remember that neither staff, volunteers nor your fellow users can provide or replace mental healthcare when that is something you need. Users struggling with issues like anxiety, depression, abuse or physical health issues are strongly encouraged to seek out qualified, in-person help with those issues in addition to peer or staff support.
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Heather
- scarleteen founder & director
- Posts: 9731
- Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
- Age: 54
- Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: they/them
- Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
- Location: Chicago
Sneaking around
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead