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How do i tell her my feelings without ruining the friendship

Posted: Tue Apr 23, 2024 10:41 pm
by -Carson-
So i am 15 and i have never dated anyone in my life, so i dont really know how this works but the start of my long story is, I met this friendly girl (she is 14) on a game called Fortnite you prob know what that is but anyways we started talking we got along very well so i added her (yes this is cringe) and we started playing everyday. Then like a few weeks later she asked for my number, so her mom could know she is not talking to some random over aged guy liveing in his moms basement so i gave her my Phone number and then thats when we clicked we started talking everyday about anything so like a month passes and she wants me to face time her so her mom can know im real (i was so fkn scared xD)my heart was pounding that we are ft alredy so i called her talked to her mom was very nice and plesnt call dident know why is was scared then after that a few months passed, (we talked everyday in those months btw) and i wanted to tell my mom about her but was like scared bc i was never talkative to girls, (like i said never had a gf or dated) and didnt know what she would think because she would always like say she would slap me or ground me if i ever had a gf this early so i never pushed it anyways she found out bc she saw a text from her. she wasent mad but insted annoyed me abt it EVERYDAY still today. but she got to know her better and her mom . she is friends with my mom now and yah that leads me to this I want to tell her i have deeper feelings for her then just best friends but i dont want to ruin the friendship and my mom geting pissed at me for it if she says no and tells people so i been keeping it to my self idk what to do help me out here she is very nice and wonderful and i want her more in my life but scared to lose it all. If u read all of this there is something wrong with u 🥹 thx

Re: How do i tell her my feelings without ruining the friendship

Posted: Wed Apr 24, 2024 7:06 am
by Willa
Hi -Carson-,

Dealing with crushes and feelings can be stressful, but it sounds like you have put a lot of thought into this situation. One intimidating thing about discussing feelings for another person is we never know how another person feels for us unless we openly communicate it to them. One thing to consider is considering the friendship now, and what you would want to change after you tell her your feelings. This is another point of communication for if you share your feelings and she reciprocates, but it can be helpful to imagine beforehand what you want to change and what you want to be similar. We can never control how another person responds to our actions, but we can weigh the risks of our actions and if we they are worth it for the possible outcome.

An important aspect if you decide to tell your friend your feelings is to be respectful. Communicate your feelings honestly while understanding that no matter what, it does not change how you value her as a friend! In the case she does not share your feelings, it is important to remember that initial rejection can be painful or overwhelming. While you would certainly be justified in feeling bummed or upset, you never want to make your friend feel responsible or take these feelings out on her. Does that all make sense? I wish you luck on whatever you chose and will leave you with a source that may be helpful:

https://www.scarleteen.com/read/relatio ... es-crushes

Re: How do i tell her my feelings without ruining the friendship

Posted: Wed Apr 24, 2024 7:32 am
by -Carson-
Thank you i will take that all into consideration, i think i will just try and wait a little longer to tell her because 9 months is not that long