Scarleteen

I discovered that I wasn't exactly straight at an all boys summer camp, long story short I'm attracted to guys. But now that I'm more accepting of that feeling I realize that I'm not that romantically attracted to guys or at least not as much as girls. I'm sexually attracted to both females and males but only romantically attracted to girls. Is this a thing? I'm 15 btw if it changes anything.

edit: it's hard to find people in the first place and online is dangerous AF. I'm from a very accepting city, and so are my parents I'm not out yet which doesn't help but I don't even know if I am bi anyway. Is me not being romanticly not attracted to guys because I haven't found anyone i would date?

Hi dontaskneverask,

It's pretty common for people who experience attraction to more than one gender to not experience that attraction the exact same way for each gender. That can be for a lot of reasons, including the one you suggested, which is that if we're relatively new to dating overall or haven't been exposed to that big a pool of potential partners, we may not have encountered a person of a particular gender that we want to date just yet.

All that is to say that if bisexual feels like the word that best describes your sexual orientation, there's no reason not to keep using it. And honestly, even if what you're describing wasn't a common experience, you're still the expert on your own feelings and experiences and what word(s), if any, best encapsulate them.

i have considered myself bisexual for one year now. I am attacted to girls but i prefer men and sometimes have a hard time imagining myself with a girlfriend or even having sex with a girl, even though i am attracted to them. I think that it's because some bisexual people struggle with accepting that they are attracted to the other sex; it takes a lot of courage to come out to yourself. But this preferences aren't definitive and are completely subjective, and they don't make you "less" bisexual; there is no such thing! they just indicate that you still have to get comfortable with embracing your sexuality. Please understand that everybidy have different sexual desires and preferences. Even if kept not wantingg a relathionsh
iup with males that would be perfectly ok.
Hope this helped xoxo

Hey there,

I can say that I also went through something like this, but only with certain guys, I didn't feel attracted sexually to any of them, but I was day dreaming about how romatic they would be and how we can hold hands and the whole taboo, although since I've changed my group of friends and contacts and started a straight relationship and all those thoughts dissapear, maybe I was confused just like you, or maybe my SO is fullfilling all my needs I was day-dreaming about, so I don't think that I'm bi anymore.

Maybe you're in a similar situation, I can tell you that time will tell you everything at the right time, you just gotta go with the flow and see what comes out

You may be romantically attracted to only one gender and sexually attracted to more than one (and vice versa), as romantic and sexual attraction are two different things, and they may not fully overlap with each other.

Moreover, it is normal for a bisexual person to have preferences and be attracted more to one gender than the other. It can also change over time. As a teenager I was more attracted to girls, now I'm more attracted to guys, and who knows how it'll look like in the next few years.