Ask Volunteer Cat Anything!

[Sam W]

Hello! Cross-posting this from reddit on Orion--the moderator's--behalf since to help get things rolling!

Orion, "My name is Orion and I volunteer with Scarleteen! I will be moderating for my fellow volunteer, Cat. Cat is a fat, autistic, and hormonally intersex queer person who has been passionate about sexual health & education since middle school. They use they/they pronouns and would love to go to graduate school next year with a focus on sexual agency for intellectually disabled people, and the intersection of neurodivergence and sex.

Cat, what sparked your interest in sexual education? "

[CaitlinEve]

Thank you for the intro, Orion (and the cross-post, Sam!)

I would say that my interest in sexual education was influenced by two big factors; my mom and my personal experience with sexual education. Growing up, my mom was an OBGYN tech so I was thankfully very accurately and appropriately educated on sexual health and the like. This led to me noticing how lacking the sexual education surrounding me, both in academic and personal settings, was for my peers. If I hadn't had a parent with such strong views on the topic, I very much doubt I would be here with my degree in sexual health promotion & education right now! And now I want to provide the acceptance and education that was provided for me because unfortunately, it's not like that for everybody.

[OrionRay]

Thank you for the intro, Orion (and the cross-post, Sam!)

I would say that my interest in sexual education was influenced by two big factors; my mom and my personal experience with sexual education. Growing up, my mom was an OBGYN tech so I was thankfully very accurately and appropriately educated on sexual health and the like. This led to me noticing how lacking the sexual education surrounding me, both in academic and personal settings, was for my peers. If I hadn't had a parent with such strong views on the topic, I very much doubt I would be here with my degree in sexual health promotion & education right now! And now I want to provide the acceptance and education that was provided for me because unfortunately, it's not like that for everybody.

That's awesome! You mentioned your passion for accessible and safe healthcare, would you mind expanding on that?

[CaitlinEve]

Of course!

I think it's hard to NOT see how a lack of accessible and safe sexual healthcare impacts people. From higher teen pregnancy and STI rates to lowered rates of reporting sexual misconduct, it's clear that prior formal sexual education was lacking in a few areas. In fact, in a study I did at my own university, I found that the form of sex ed that most impacted students was individual research (by almost 20%)! By providing safe, accurate, appropriate, and accessible sexual education, we give people the tools they need to learn about their body and mind without shame.

[OrionRay]

Of course!

I think it's hard to NOT see how a lack of accessible and safe sexual healthcare impacts people. From higher teen pregnancy and STI rates to lowered rates of reporting sexual misconduct, it's clear that prior formal sexual education was lacking in a few areas. In fact, in a study I did at my own university, I found that the form of sex ed that most impacted students was individual research (by almost 20%)! By providing safe, accurate, appropriate, and accessible sexual education, we give people the tools they need to learn about their body and mind without shame.

That totally makes sense! You mentioned sexual agency being something you're passionate about, could you extrapolate on that?

[CaitlinEve]

Sexual agency is something that is deeply personal for everybody, no matter their level of sexual interest. From asexuals to allosexuals, everybody should have the right to do what they want with their body as long as it is safe, sane, and consensual.

However, there is definitely a disconnect between sexuality and sexual health education for people with intellectual disabilities compared to those without. Oftentimes, people (especially parents of disabled individuals) don't like to think about the fact that sex and masturbation are something that people with intellectual disabilities participate in, because it makes them uncomfortable. Removing that stigma is paramount to allowing safe, sane, and consensual sexual agency to those who are often not allowed it.

To anybody interested in learning more about this topic, I would recommend reading Already Doing It by Michael Gill!

[OrionRay]

Sexual agency is something that is deeply personal for everybody, no matter their level of sexual interest. From asexuals to allosexuals, everybody should have the right to do what they want with their body as long as it is safe, sane, and consensual.

However, there is definitely a disconnect between sexuality and sexual health education for people with intellectual disabilities compared to those without. Oftentimes, people (especially parents of disabled individuals) don't like to think about the fact that sex and masturbation are something that people with intellectual disabilities participate in, because it makes them uncomfortable. Removing that stigma is paramount to allowing safe, sane, and consensual sexual agency to those who are often not allowed it.

To anybody interested in learning more about this topic, I would recommend reading Already Doing It by Michael Gill!

That is really powerful, thank you. Now, about your personal experience, how does being fat impact the way you interact with queerness/the queer community?

[CaitlinEve]

That's a fantastic question!

I would say that being fat has impacted just about every aspect of my life, honestly. It took me a long time after my weight gain (due to a combination of PCOS and medications) to accept myself and to even use that word. I felt like it wasn't 'fair' that I was fat, because it 'wasn't my fault'. Of course, I know now that this is incredibly outdated and redundant thinking because being fat isn't wrong; your weight isn't a moral failing. But for a while, I felt a disconnect between my physical body and my mind which I can liken to my struggles with my gender. In many ways, my queerness and my weight are intertwined, and throughout coming to terms with my gender I also came to terms with the body I inhabit; it is mine and nobody else's, so who gives a shit what other people think?

Now, being fat is an identity that is equal to my queerness, and I embrace it and I feel embraced by my community in turn.

[OrionRay]

That's a fantastic question!

I would say that being fat has impacted just about every aspect of my life, honestly. It took me a long time after my weight gain (due to a combination of PCOS and medications) to accept myself and to even use that word. I felt like it wasn't 'fair' that I was fat, because it 'wasn't my fault'. Of course, I know now that this is incredibly outdated and redundant thinking because being fat isn't wrong; your weight isn't a moral failing. But for a while, I felt a disconnect between my physical body and my mind which I can liken to my struggles with my gender. In many ways, my queerness and my weight are intertwined, and throughout coming to terms with my gender I also came to terms with the body I inhabit; it is mine and nobody else's, so who gives a shit what other people think?

Now, being fat is an identity that is equal to my queerness, and I embrace it and I feel embraced by my community in turn.

I absolutely love that, thank you for sharing!!! Would you mind expanding on what you mean by feeling embraced by the community? What does that look like for you?

[CaitlinEve]

To me, being embraced is mainly about support! I feel like I'm a pretty extroverted person in general, and a lot of that is thriving on having a community that I feel comfortable in. I grew up surrounded by a strong community of queer women (roller derby!), and I feel the echoes of that impact in me every time I think of the privilege I have to be able to be open and comfortable with my family about being a queer person. My goal is ultimately to provide that embrace, that comfort and support, to anybody who needs it.

[OrionRay]

To me, being embraced is mainly about support! I feel like I'm a pretty extroverted person in general, and a lot of that is thriving on having a community that I feel comfortable in. I grew up surrounded by a strong community of queer women (roller derby!), and I feel the echoes of that impact in me every time I think of the privilege I have to be able to be open and comfortable with my family about being a queer person. My goal is ultimately to provide that embrace, that comfort and support, to anybody who needs it.

I love that!!! I have a question about something you mentioned previously, about sexual agency. Would you mind talking about what that is, and what it may look like for others seeking it?

[CaitlinEve]

I can totally expand on that, I'll try not to get off track this time haha!

Sexual agency, put simply, is the ability to solely control your body and your sexual needs without them being under the 'jurisdiction' of someone else. For some people, this may seem obvious; why wouldn't someone be able to have the last say about their body and what they do with it? But many people don't have that privilege, whether it's due to disability, location, or other factors. One way this presents in disabled individuals could be the parent of an intellectually disabled 30 year old who does not allow said 30yo to participate in dating or sex, or may even punish said interests.

[OrionRay]

Oooo, thank you for explaining! I'm sure someone will find that helpful. How does your degree play into this passion?

[CaitlinEve]

It honestly took me a while to figure out what I wanted to get my degree in. I am incredibly privileged and lucky to have gotten a chance to get a degree at no cost, but the flip side of that was that I was scrambling to figure out what I wanted to do in my life very quickly.

But when I realized I could focus my degree on sexual education, it was like suddenly there was a very clear path for me. Getting to intern at Scarleteen to finish up my bachelor's degree was one of the best things that I've ever been able to do, as I've used Scarleteen as a resource and a recommendation since middle school (thanks to my mom, again!). And now that I have my degree, I would really love to continue providing sexual education as a career on top of continuing to volunteer here for as long as I can, to help support a resource that helped me and many of my friends. It's definitely a dream of mine that I'm making come true! <3