Scarleteen

I'm currently in a relationship I feel really happy in, but lately i dont want to have sex with him. we only ever have oral sex, but lately i can't go through with it because i feel like his penis "smells". it doesnt necesarily smell bad, it just smells a lot. at the beggining i looked up if that could be due to a hygiene problem, but after seeing the results i noticed that the smells described in the articles as "concerning" did not match how i would describe his smell. so i guess my question is, is it normal for a penis to have its own particular scent? if so, how much does it smell? because his i can smell as soon as he takes his underwear off, even if my face is nowhere near it.

i want to know if this is normal because lately i find it harder to understand whether im actually attracted to him or not, and maybe if this smell is normal like i presume it to be, it would just mean im looking for excuses to not want to be intimate with him instead of just outright admiting to myself that i dont find him sexually attractive anymore.

Hi Sarabuckett,

Yes, it is normal for penises to have their own scent, just because people's bodies can have unique scents. Even if the scent is normal, it doesn't mean that you have to like it personally. I can't say for sure if your partner's scent is concerning, so I have a few questions:

• Has the scent always been the same, or is this a recent change?

• Have you noticed the scent being better after your partner takes a bath?

• Aside from this issue, are you satisfied with your sex life together? Is there anything you would like to change?

Topics like hygiene and body odors may be sensitive, but you can try to have a conversation with your partner about where this scent is coming from.

Hi sarabuckett,

In addition to what Latha said, can you tell me a bit more about feeling like you can't tell if you're attracted to him or not? Is it that your attraction has changed over time? Or more that you're not sure if what you're feeling IS attraction?