Roleplay

[Archer]

I don't know if I posted this before.
But I have been interested in bdsm and online dating. But I don't know how to start doing both.
I'm 15 years old and want to stay safe doing this stuff

[Heather]

Hey there, Archer.

So, online dating isn't something that's usually open to legal minors: nearly all apps (and maybe all, period, I haven't circled through them all for this for a while) are only open to people 18+. But if you like, we can certainly talk about dating options for teens that aren't app-based, if you like.

In terms of BDSM, as would be the case with an interest in any kind of sexual activity that involves a partner, the partner kind of has to come before the activity. Are you actively seeing anyone right now?

[Archer]

Ok I would be interested in a relationship. How would I even start. I am afraid I am too mature for my age

[Latha]

Hi Archer,

I think you can start by giving yourself the opportunity to find people you might want to date - this could be at school or at clubs and social events outside of school. Then, you could try to get to know these people and see if you have a connection. It is a pretty similar process to online dating, all things considered.

What gives you the sense that you are too mature for your age?

[Sam W]

Hi Archer,

In addition to Latha's advice, and the question she asked, I want to give you these articles, which have some excellent advice on dating as a process:
I Just Want a Relationship
How to Change A Pass/Fail Dating Mindset
How do I ask a guy out?

[Archer]

My therapist tells me I am very self-aware for my age and most teenage boys are immature. I think deeply about a lot of things. Also are there any healthy ways to express my sexuality as a teen.

[Sam W]

Hi Archer,

Thanks for that additional detail!

I do want to say that, as someone who very much got the "you're so mature for your age," all it really did in the long run was make me pre-emptively not pursue relationships--platonic and romantic--because I figured the other person would be too immature. Too, in retrospect it's funny to me that people talked about my peers of all genders as being immature as if this was some sign of them doing something; we were 15. Of course we were immature. We were literally in the process of maturing, even those of us who "acted older."

All that is to say that I think Latha's suggestions are good starting places, because they'll get you out and mingling with your peers in a way that lets you get to know them and find people who have similar interests, values, etc as you do.

When it comes to expressing yourself sexually, masturbation is really the way to go. It allows you to explore and connect with your sexuality on your own terms.

[Archer]

What counts as hard-core porn also what are some female friendly porn sites

[Latha]

Hi there, Archer!

I can't give you specific recommendations for porn sites, but I can answer your first question. Hard-core porn tends to involve explicit or detailed depictions of sexual activities and body parts like the genitals. This is in contrast to 'soft-core' porn, which is erotic/sexual in nature, but is usually less detailed. In hardcore porn, you might see intercourse happening on-screen, while in soft core porn, it might be off-screen or implied.