Scarleteen

Back in this website again cause I’m actually not used to this.

So I met this dude for the first time due to school reasons which I will not reveal for a reason and honestly he is like really nonchalant if you ask me. Apparently when the school work started, I obviously got to be around him more but with that I’m kinda starting to see some “signs” which actually scared me since I’m around the aroace spectrum. It all started when he asked me if I wanted to sit at the table instead since I was doing school work stuff in the floor and obviously I said yes. Since I didn’t really had that much stuff to bring which the only thing I had was my iPad, Camera and phone which I could bring it all to the table myself. When I was about to grab my phone, all of a sudden he got it for me and put it in the table which I was confused but I thanked him. And throughout the schoolwork he kept doing all those gentleman stuff and keeps assuring if I’m doing okay or if there is any need of help in which I was starting to notice something. And the last day of the school work due to an event, it was the day I needed to help organize some stuff and since there were no chairs left I asked anyone if there is anywhere I could sit and immediately that dude offered me his seat instead which I said thank you but also we ended up sitting in that same chair since the chair was like a square type with no back support. And that was the day it stuck to my head that maybe he likes me? Idk. Maybe I’m just overthinking about it cause there is possible chances he was raised to be like that? Although he does assure people, he does the gentleman stuff more to me? Idk.. I need help if it is just me overthinking.

Hey Epiphanyxx!

It sounds like this guy has been nice and kind to you, and I'm so sorry that this isn't more common of an experience! It'd be nice if everyone was a kinder to each-other, and offered folks a seat when they needed it etc.

Of course it's a little easier to be kinder to people we like either as a friend or a crush, but I wouldn't make any assumptions based on his behavior so far.

Are you are into him? I don't think it'd hurt to spend more time with him, and if these small acts of kindness and warmth are part of why you might find him attractive, I think that's a pretty good reason to be into someone!

We can't tell you here how he feels about you, only he can do that, but it sounds like he could at least be a good prospect to get to know better, but whether that's as a friend or as a potential partner, you won't know until you eventually talk about it.

I’m not into him. As mentioned I am around the aroace spectrum and anyone showing “signs” scares me honestly since I’ll feel bad for rejecting and like it’ll be awkward after.

Hi there Epiphanyxx,

that makes sense, thank you for clarifying!
Could you share more about how might that awkwardness you are worried about look like and why you find it scary?
I would say that while we all obviously want to avoid any uncomfortable situations, I think it’s good to remember that there will always be things like awkwardness, being rejected or having to reject present in our lives and are a normal part of them. And often the worries we have beforehand are worse than the actual situation.

I also want to echo what Jacob said, only the person himself can tell you how they feel about you, not us now anyone else can do that. So it might be helpful to think about whether you need to know that and if so, then why?