Pregnancy scare

[sbritocorona036]

Hey everyone, I'm new here but I'd like to get a hand or two. I'm super freaked out, me and my gf had protected sex April 30th (she was three days into her menstrual cycle according to the flo app but didn't present any bleeding), there was a condom change midway trough since it was starting to wrinkle from the bottom, this kind of concerns me as I'm worried about pre-cum leaking and getting directly into her, I wiped my hands on my shirt after touching my genitals before touching either her privates or the condom, we did a water test and confirmed it didn't break.
she's currently 13 days late into her period and were FREAKING OUT its the most late she's ever been and although protection was used, were still super worried , just looking for some support over here (I'd love to know some reasons as to why her period can come so late).
She's been becoming a bit irregular (last 4 periods were from 3 to 8 days late), I understand safe sex poses no risk but the fear of anything going wrong is still really present, mostly on her.
This has become super stressing, her mum already has asked her if there's any reason to be pregnant and she's denied everything so far, but she's becoming more and more suspicious of her.
This time the small percentages of ineffectiveness come flooding into my head, small details that I overthink a lot about, pre-cum going into her, stuff like that that's made me lose sleep.
I'm just really worried here due to the nature of our families and the fact were just about to get into college, her getting preggo would mean us having to drop everything, its honestly the most worried I've ever been in a long time, any help appreciated.

[CaitlinEve]

Hi sbritocorona036, welcome to Scarleteen!

So you mention that your girlfriend's menstrual cycle was late when you had this encounter, have you had sex before? It's unlikely for her menstruation to have already been affected by that instance of sex; but it's not out of the realm of possibility that she's pregnant from sex you've had previously. I also want to correct something you said; safe sex does NOT pose 'no risk'. What you describe, penis-in-vagina sex, definitely poses a risk of pregnancy even with precautions being taken. The risk is slimmer with contraceptives like condoms, but it's not non-existent. I know this probably isn't what you wanted to hear, but it's important that you're aware of it. I want to refer you to this article, The Pregnancy Panic Companion for more information on this. This is not to say that she IS or IS NOT pregnant! There are of course other reasons periods can be delayed (stress, diet, illness) and it does seem like she has a recent history of late menstruation. I would recommend that your girlfriend speaks to a doctor about these concerns, especially if this is new for her.

[sbritocorona036]

In the topic of recent sex, we had 3 months of no sexual contact, I understand the "no risk" part was not worded correctly, I understand the real risks of PIV sex, were active sexually but these few months we haven't been able to see each other as much as we used to, she's got an appointment to go check what's up with her but in the meantime were just worried

[CaitlinEve]

I'm glad you're aware of the risks, just wanted to make sure! Your girlfriend has had a period since the last time you had sex, correct? It may ease your minds to take a pregnancy test in the time you're waiting for her appointment. I completely understand your worry and I'm sorry you're dealing with this anxiety.

[sbritocorona036]

yes, she's had her past periods no problem, only a tad bit late but apart from that no issues, we're going to get a test as soon as we can, as our situation hinders our hability to access one, thanks for your understanding.

[sbritocorona036]

As a side note, I forgot to mention the fact that I didn't ejaculate when we had intimacy, we stopped due to some knocking on the door and that was it.

[CaitlinEve]

A lack of ejaculation does lower the probability of pregnancy. Check out this advice column!

[sbritocorona036]

Thanks for the advice, I did take precautions when handling my genitals to avoid pre seminal fluid transfer as much as I could, I always pee in the morning and before going to bed plus I don't practice masturbation a lot, this gives me a bit mor peace of mind, thanks!

[CaitlinEve]

Sperm is fragile so even if you did masturbate a lot or not pee in the mornings/before bed like you mention, it wouldn't survive the transfer from your genitals to your hands through the air to your girlfriend's genitals!

[sbritocorona036]

wow, I honestly thought sperm would be a bit more resilient due to what I was taught, only worries I have now have to do with the wrinkling of the condom, I know I changed it as soon as I noticed it but I'm still a bit worried about pre seminal leaking one or other way

[CaitlinEve]

Here's an article about sperm cells that you may find helpful! As for the condom; when you say wrinkling, could you be more specific? Sometimes condoms just fit 'weird', that doesn't mean anything was necessarily wrong with it.

[sbritocorona036]

when I put it in it fit good, not too tight not too loose, after about 15 mins I noticed it started retracting from the base (the rubber band like part) about a pointer finger worth, that's when I decided to change it.

[sbritocorona036]

by retracting I mean it was like when you roll up a sleeve kinda, but not too much.

[sbritocorona036]

also, after the change, that problem didn't occur again

[sbritocorona036]

Just had a conversation with her asking about when she ovulated and such, she tells me she had some light bleeding/spotting on April 13th and she marked it as ovulation in her app, I'm wondering if ovulation causes bleeding or if there's a chance she got an early period of some sort

[Eddie]

For what you are describing the condom always stayed on and when you changed it it stayed on too. As others stated before, sperm cells are very delicate so you changing the condom with your hands doesn't pose a risk either.

Per your girlfriend's period, it would be very difficult to say what means what because she is the only person who knows her body and how it usually works. But, to rule out any risk, taking a pregnancy test will always help.

[sbritocorona036]

So from my understanding, no significative risk was present with both the condom an pre seminal fluid transfer, with my gfs period, we are still uncertain and will get a test as soon as we can

[KierC]

Hi there!

Yes, your understanding is correct. Does hearing all that help a bit with the pregnancy worries?

[sbritocorona036]

yes it does! so, just to sum up, we practiced safe sex with little risk taken, her period being late might be something else and pregnancy is unlikely, please correct me if I'm a wrong and thanks you again.

[KierC]

You are very welcome! You are right: since the condom remained intact, you can be sure there was no significant risk, and the late period is mostly likely unrelated (or could be exacerbated by stress if that is a factor!). If the anxiety continues, a pregnancy test can tell you for sure. I hope that helps a bit!

[sbritocorona036]

Thanks, it sure does, she's gotten an appointment with a gynecologist to see what's going on, meanwhile I guess we can rest assured pregnancy is the least probable scenario for us, thanks, a lot.

[KierC]

You are very welcome! That sounds like a great idea.