Scarleteen

(Apologies if this post seems strangely worded, my autocorrect hates me)
Please let me know if I missed a post about this, I found one but it didn't quite seem similar enough to my situation...
I'm 14, in my freshman year of high school. And honestly it could not be going much better. However, I feel really awkward, because I keep getting invited to pool parties and I want to wear my bikini (love a good tan line) but I have the worst pubic hair problem!! It's dark, thick, and curly, and very noticeable when it oozes out of my bottoms. (Oh god ooze was definitely not the right word) I was already bothered by this before because it's very itchy and uncomfortable (and also gets really gross during my period) but this just makes it worse. I've halfheartedly tried trimming and shaving it, but it comes back immediately! My parents are really overprotective and won't let me wax or get laser hair removal... What should I do?

Hello and welcome, sévignésablé! Don't worry, your post is fine, and we're happy to answer your question. <3

As I see it, there isn't anything inherently wrong with pubic hair being visible outside a swimsuit. It is just a body part--one that most people have. There are plenty of folks for whom seeing public hair like this is essentially unremarkable. Unfortunately, other people do not always see it that way, and that isn't always easy to manage. What matters most here is your own comfort: both in how it feels, and in the interactions you are comfortable with having with people who might not react respectfully.

So, to start, I have a few questions:

• Do you know how your peers usually manage this at the pool? Have you heard them talk about pubic hair?

• What would you think of wearing shorts or bottoms with a skirt to the pool?

• Would it help if you could shave your bikini line right before these parties?

I have been too embarrassed to ask my friends about how they manage their pubic hair, though one of them has told me she has gotten laser hair removal due to similar issues. I definitely don't mind wearing shorts to the pool, so that seems like a good solution! I'll definitely keep my eye out for a pair that matches my top. And in the meantime I'll try to shave immediately before the party. Thanks so much for the tips!

sévignésablé,

I am glad you have found this guidance helpful! The culture here in the states has made it nearly impossible to feel comfortable in our bodies, but if I quick remedy like shaving or shorts makes you feel better, I say go for it. Please be kind to yourself and body. All the best!