Scarleteen

My boyfriend and I had sex on November 20 and I thought he had put the condom on already but turns out he failed to mention the condom wasn’t on. It was only in there for a minute and he takes atleast 20 minutes to finish. I got so mad because I felt so violated and we had a huge argument because I was on cycle day 10 and according to my app I was one day from potential fertile day. The next day we were just laying down in bed when he asked me to put it in without the condom and I said no but I felt so pressured cus I didn’t want to make him feel bad so I said fine but it wasn’t even in for 5 seconds. The problem was that it was cycle day 11 where my app was telling me I was “potentially fertile” now I’m so scared because my clue app is saying I’m three days late to my period but Flo is saying I’m one day late and I’m just so angry that this is happening. All last week I was very emotional and getting cramps and back pain and sore breasts but now everything is gone and I’m just so terrified and angry. I don’t want to break up with my boyfriend because this is the first time does this but I’m blaming him so much for this and I can’t tell when to take a test. Please help me, I don’t know what app to trust. I also want to note that the day my app said I was supposed to ovulate I had creamy white discharge and the following week was the same. Does that mean anything?

Hello and welcome to the boards, Walkbaly!

I'm so sorry to hear that your partner was not wearing a condom when you expected that he would. It makes a lot of sense that you would feel upset and violated--if you two didn't agree not to use condoms, this was a violation, and a betrayal of your trust. It is not okay that he did this.

I understand how things would feel terrifying right now, given where things are with your boyfriend, the possibility of pregnancy, and the symptoms you've been experiencing. I'm glad you reached out to us, though--if you need it, we'll be here to support you and help you think though your options, whatever happens.

First things first, we should find out whether you are pregnant: Pregnancy tests are reliable when they are taken at least 14 days after a risk that you are concerned about. Since you had sex on the 20th/21st of November, a pregnancy test that you take now should be accurate. Do you feel comfortable buying a test, or visiting a health clinic that can provide one?

Yes I do feel comfortable. Are the ones they sell at dollar tree reliable? I’m just so scared right now. My cycle is pretty regular and the last time there was an incident like this I ended up being four days late and I got it after day 34. So I’m kinda hoping maybe I’ll get it tonight or tomorrow morning as it is day 34 today. I’m not sure what I can and can’t ask here but is there a very high chance of pregnancy? Even thought he didn’t finish in me and claims he was dry? Is this a reason to break up? I don’t think it’s fair that he put through this. I’ve also been working out a lot more so I hope maybe that can be a factor as well

Hi Walkbaly,

To start off, yes! You can trust dollar store pregnancy tests. The tests sold there will have the same FDA approval as tests from more expensive stores. A pregnancy test from anywhere will work so long as the packaging is intact and it is not past its expiration date.

There are many factors to becoming pregnant so there's no way for us to give you a good prediction of the likelihood that you are pregnant. Besides, stressing about a potential pregnancy before we know the results of the test will only make things more difficult. When semen enters the vaginal canal and the uterus owner is not taking contraception, there is a chance of pregnancy. Even if your partner didn't ejaculate, there could still have been semen from the preejaculate.

Here's an article about someone experiencing something similar: He pulled out, but now I'm late

In terms of your relationship, I have to say that the pressure you feel to have sex in a way you don't want is a sign that something is missing from your relationship. Have you been able to express to your partner that you feel unable to turn them down for unprotected sex? Since this happened, have the two of you had a conversation about how you feel?