I'm confused about attraction

[facepaint]

I haven't felt any sort of sexual attraction to someone yet, neither men or women. Usually when I say this people tell me I'm asexual, but I have a fetish for something. When am I going to feel normal sexual things?

[char]

Hello facepaint, welcome to the boards! Happy to have you here

To answer your question: there's no standard period for when you start feeling "normal sexual things." Even though puberty can make some teenagers experience a lot of arousal (as commonly portrayed in the media, especially if said teenager is a cisgender guy), the process isn't a one-size-fits-all. Sometimes it can look like not feeling attracted to anyone sexually, and that's completely okay. You're not "broken" by any means. Not to mention that considering you're 14, you likely still have a lot of time to meet other people you haven't met and be attracted to them, sexually or not.

You also mentioned that some people tell you that you're asexual for not feeling sexual attraction, despite having certain sexual fantasies yourself. I'd like to let you know that the label asexual means a lot of things for different people, and you don't have to identify with that label if it doesn't sound right to you. As you can read in this advice column of ours about asexuality, asexuality can mean not having a desire to have sex with other people despite having sexual fantasies.

How do you feel about all these? I wonder if these following articles can help you as well:
- Am I normal? Who cares?
- What does sexual attraction feel like?
- Happy Ace Week from Scarleteen!